Some people think that people who immigrate to a new country should accept the new culture as their own rather than remain in separate minority groups and live in different lifestyles. Do you agree or disagree?
could help you to understand how you communicate with them
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
could give you many opportunities in the future
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
introduction conclusion present
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion, which are critical to establish the context and summarize the overarching argument effectively. Consider starting with a general statement about the issue before stating your opinion. End the essay with a conclusion that restates your stance and summarizes the main points.
logical structure
The essay demonstrates a weak logical structure and lack of paragraphing. Ideas should be organized into clear paragraphs, each containing one main point that is elaborated upon. Use transitional phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs.
supported main points
The main points in the essay are not sufficiently developed and supported. Use specific examples and detailed explanations to strengthen your argument. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the subsequent sentences elaborate on that point.
complete response
The response does not fully address the question. It is crucial to directly address the prompt and develop a clear argument. Make sure your response is complete by both agreeing or disagreeing with the statement and explaining why, providing analysis and examples to justify your viewpoint.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented in the essay are vague and require a much clearer expression. Take the time to expand upon your ideas, ensuring they are comprehensive and detailed. Clarity can be achieved through careful explanation and use of examples that are directly relevant to the given topic.
relevant specific examples
While relevant examples are slightly present, they are not specific enough and lack detail. Aim to include examples that clearly illustrate your point and show a deeper level of analysis related to the topic of cultural adaptation and community integration.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
In today’s digital age, the appearance of individuals possessing smartphones is becoming a recurring argument. In this essay, the writer assumes that the benefits of owning a mobile phone can boost one’s creativity and maintain relationships with acquaintances outweigh the drawbacks of exacerbating the user’s health.
Nowadays, computers become an essential part of students' life. This essay believes the main problems associated with dependence on computers are the lack of problem-solving skills, and detrimental effects on the handwriting of students and suggests critical thinking classes and handwriting classes as the most viable solutions.
In the present time, a wide entent of citizens are unable to identify their next-door neighbours in metropolis. This problem is attributable to the drawbacks of city life. However, a range of problems have been identified and need to be addressed.
While a large number of individuals opine that schooling must be provided till the students turn 18 as this is the perfect time to learn the basics of literacy ; however several think that school education is enough for the age of 14 years due to the conception that at this stage kid is ready to explore the new stuff .In my opinion, the former view is more fruitful as till the age of 14 a youngster is ready to learn but he lacks understanding of good and bad . Only after eighteen,a juvenile is ready to know all about the future.
It is true that some feel living in a solitary house is better, while other believe there are more appropriate to living in a flat. In this essay, I will explain why I tend to agree with the former.