You recently attended a training course for your work. Your employer has asked you for your feedback on the training course. Write a letter to your employer. In your letter remind your employer what the course was about explain why the course was useful to you in your work suggest why the course may not be suitable for some of your other colleagues

#course #work #employer #feedback #colleagues

Dear Mr. Ariani I am writing to give you

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apply

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feedback with regard to the communicational skill course that I recently

participate

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participated

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in, as you requested. Since

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apply

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the purpose of

this

course was mainly to enhance our soft skills in a working environment, most of its lessons were

tought

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taught

by a professional psychologist. He

intruduced

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introduced

the

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to the

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newest techniques for

communicate

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communicating

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with people from different social classes. I find

this

courese

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course

very useful for me because the fact that I

wokr

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work

as a member of the representative group of our company and

Correct pronoun usage

my communicational

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communicational

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communication

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skills would be of significant importance for us to be able to persuade our customers to buy our products. So I think others from our department should join

this

course as well.

However

, courses like

this

will not be beneficial for those who work in other sectors like the production lane. For them, I believe, learning hard skills would be of prime importance. So I think you might need to provide them with more useful courses

according

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according to

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their special jobs. I look forward to hearing from you about any

further

courses

with

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show examples

this

regard. Yours Faithfully, Arash Abbasi

Submitted by greatsoloist on Fri Dec 01 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea for enhanced clarity. While the letter did delineate the ideas, clearer paragraphing could further improve the coherence of the text.

task achievement

Include a specific example or detail about how the communication skills gained from the course have already been applied to your role or how you envision applying them. This will strengthen the explanation of the course's usefulness.

task achievement

Avoid grammatical errors such as 'I am writing to give you a feedback,' which should be 'I am writing to give you feedback.' Pay close attention to article use and pluralization to avoid minor errors that can impact the overall score.

coherence cohesion

Maintain a formal tone consistently throughout the letter. Be careful with informal contractions or casual language.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

191 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Training program
Skill enhancement
Job responsibilities
Practical exercises
Hands-on experience
Operational efficiency
Subject matter
Prerequisites
Specialized knowledge
Teaching methodology
Learning preferences
Feedback
Course facilitator
Professional development
Engagement
Interactive components

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Politicians or more responsible for the protection of the environment than individual stock to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people work for the same company or organisation during their whole working life,while other say that it is better to work for different companies and organisations. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The world has been an enormous increase in flights for leisure, business and commercial purposes around the world over the recent years. Why do you think are the main advantages and disadvantages of such flights? Do you think flights should be taxed more?

Some people believe that schools should focus on academic subjects only, while others think that schools should also provide classes on life skills, such as communication and teamwork. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.