Universities and colleges are now offering qualifications through distance learning from the Internet rather than teachers in the classroom. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, qualifications issued by universities can be offered through online learning
instead
of face-to-face teaching. Although
students
may have less
social interactions during their studies, I believe that Correct quantifier usage
fewer
this
disadvantage can be outweighted
by the fact that Correct your spelling
outweighed
students
can have a wider choice of college programmes.
There is no doubt that students
who learn in
campus will interact with others more often than those who complete their studies through the Internet. One major part of the college life of Change preposition
on
students
is the social activities they participated
Wrong verb form
participate
outside
the classroom. Change preposition
in outside
For example
, they can attend different activities such
as movie nights or sport
competitions with others. Change the noun form
sports
Students
who are studying through distance learning will miss out these
events as they require physical Change preposition
on these
attendence
. Correct your spelling
attendance
Hence
they have less social interactions with others, which lower
their interpersonal skills.
Correct subject-verb agreement
lowers
However
, the development of teaching in a virtual classroom can offer student
more choices when they select which university to study in. Back in the Fix the agreement mistake
students
days
, Fix the agreement mistake
day
students
may be
restricted Wrong verb form
have been
to enroll
in local colleges Change preposition
from enrolling
due to
the high travelling fees and accomendation
problems. Correct your spelling
accommodation
As a result
, a lot of students
were forced to study in majors that they were not interested in, as their local university did not offer the courses they want
. But with overseas colleges providing online programmes to global Wrong verb form
wanted
students
nowadays, students
can freely choose their field of studies in universities around the world without the heavy financial weight of expensive airplane
tickets and rent.
In conclusion, there may be Change the spelling
aeroplane
less
social interactions for online Correct quantifier usage
fewer
students
, the benefit of being able to enroll
easily in universities not limited to their home town Change the spelling
enrol
outweights
the cons of obtaining qualifications online.Correct your spelling
outweighs
out weights
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logical structure
The essay generally follows a clear and logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion are too brief and lack a clear thesis and summary statement. Work on developing a strong introduction that clearly states the topic and your stance, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points and reiterates your position.
introduction conclusion present
The essay does not include an introductory paragraph with clear thesis statement. To improve, ensure that each essay begins with an introduction that includes a thesis statement, which clearly outlines your position on the topic. The conclusion should then effectively summarize the main points discussed and reaffirm the thesis.
supported main points
While the main points are somewhat supported, develop your paragraphs with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen the arguments. Use specific instances and concrete illustrations to substantiate your points, providing depth to your reasoning and making your writing more persuasive.
complete response
The response covers the task and attempts to present advantages and disadvantages. However, the essay should expand on the implications and significance of each advantage and disadvantage. To achieve a higher score, explain and analyze the points more thoroughly to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
clear comprehensive ideas
The ideas presented are relevant, but their development is at times superficial. For a higher band score, ensure ideas are expressed comprehensively and explored in depth. Use more complex sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary to convey nuances and fine distinctions in your argument.
relevant specific examples
Relevant examples are used but could be more specific and detailed. Using a variety of specific, real-world examples strengthens the essay and shows a clearer understanding of the topic. Make sure examples directly support your argument in a way that convincingly relates back to the question posed.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example