IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think schools should group pupils according to their academic capabilities, but other believes pupils with different abilities should be educated together. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #schools #group #pupils #capabilities #abilities
Mixing
studdent
Correct your spelling
student
students
 with different learning abilities is the new trend,
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 many schools have
applied
Verb problem
adopted
show examples
. Yet specialized
cenetrs
Correct your spelling
courses
 focusing on pupils with limited abilities
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 still favourable
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 many parents. In
this
 article am going to discuss both views. On one hand, many caregivers prefer specialized
instituations
Correct your spelling
institutions
 for their children with learning difficulties. They think that they accept
limited
Add an article
a limited
show examples
 number in each class, providing
focus
Add an article
a focus
show examples
 on their needs and extra attention.
Also
 from a
pschycological
Correct your spelling
psychological
 point of view, those classes are usually less stressful, as grasping knowledge and comprehension is very comparable among them.
On the other hand
,
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
 studies have
suppored
Correct your spelling
supported
 the idea of mixing
students
 with learning disabilities with other ordinary
students
, owing to the tremendous
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
. There
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 a huge improvement when those less gifted
pupils
Change noun form
pupils'
pupil's
show examples
 results were measured. As
childern
Correct your spelling
children
 usually learn by model, those
students
 copied their
colleugues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
, which improved their social skills and boomed their learning curve.
Suprizingly
Correct your spelling
Surprisingly
 the studies showed an added value to the regular
students
 as well, they learnt how to become more
compasionate
Correct your spelling
compassionate
, caring and much accepting when mixed with those who are less
previllaged
Correct your spelling
privileged
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 totally support preventing segregation of
students
according to
 their abilities. The
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
outstand
Verb problem
outweigh
show examples
 the disadvantages in both groups, owing to faster learning and added skills
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
needed
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, yet the moral
leasons
Correct your spelling
lessons
 to regular pupils are significant. In conclusion,
sperating
Correct your spelling
separating
operating
 student with learning difficulties in specialized setting still exist,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 the advantages of administering them in regular schools are enormous to both
students
 and society.
Submitted by e.g.slais on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly states both sides of the argument and includes a thesis statement that reflects your opinion.
Task Achievement
Expand on your main points by providing more specific examples and evidence to substantiate your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on developing a clear logical progression of ideas throughout your essay. Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing effectively to guide the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
Include a more distinct separation between the discussion of the two views and your opinion to improve clarity.
Lexical Resource and Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Avoid informal language and utilize a more academic tone and vocabulary.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: