IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Q. An increase in production of consumer goods results in damaging the environment. What are the causes of this and give a possible solution?

#q #production #consumer #goods #results #environment
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The raising of mass
production
Use synonyms
 of consumer
goods
Use synonyms
 damages the environment. In
this
Linking Words
essaay
Correct your spelling
essay
, I will talk about two possible causes of
this
Linking Words
 issue and give recommendations
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 tackling
this
Linking Words
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the raising
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
production
Use synonyms
 means more
carbon
Use synonyms
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
created
Add a missing verb
are created
show examples
. During the process of
production
Use synonyms
, factories
are using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 machines that emit
carbon
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 the air. The
extention
Correct your spelling
extension
 of
production
Use synonyms
 means that machines
are use
Change the verb form
are used
are using
show examples
 more often and emit more
carbon
Use synonyms
. Excess
carbon
Use synonyms
 dioxide in the air will create a greenhouse effect that will cause global
temprature
Correct your spelling
temperature
temperatures
 to rise.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
 of consumer
goods
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 will
also
Linking Words
 create waste problems. In producing their
goods
Use synonyms
, factories will create waste that contains harmful chemicals. Excess waste without proper management may result in polluting the water
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 can be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 aquatic life. In order to prevent factories
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 damaging the environment,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 can create
campaign
Add an article
a campaign
show examples
 that talks about the danger of
this
Linking Words
 so people would buy
goods
Use synonyms
 based on only what they need and not
over consume
Add a hyphen
over-consume
show examples
.
Submitted by jehanboo on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that you have clear introductory and concluding paragraphs that define the scope of the essay and summarize the main points and solutions.
logical structure
Develop the logical structure of your arguments by connecting ideas with appropriate linking words and ensuring paragraphs flow smoothly from one to the next.
supported main points
Elaborate on your main points by explaining them more comprehensively and providing more detailed examples to support your arguments.
complete response
Address all parts of the task by ensuring your essay answers the question fully and meets the required word count for the IELTS writing task.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify your ideas by expanding on them and providing more depth to the analysis of causes and the discussion of solutions.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more specific examples to strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • resource depletion
  • sustainable production
  • biodegradable waste
  • environmental degradation
  • habitat destruction
  • consumption patterns
  • pollution
  • non-essential goods
  • minimalist lifestyle
  • ethical purchasing
  • planned obsolescence
  • throwaway culture
  • recycling programs
  • eco-friendly technologies
  • environmental regulations
  • deforestation
  • biodiversity loss
  • agenda environmental
  • green initiatives
  • corporate responsibility
What to do next:
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