In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone app is becoming increasingly common. Does these development have more advantages or disadvantages?

#countries #phone #app #development

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Nowadays, it is believed by some individuals that utilising a

payment

application on

phone

Correct article usage

a phone

show examples

needs

rise

Fix the infinitive

to rise

show examples

and become a new habit because it is more efficient and beneficial for them.

Although

another group refuses

this

, I believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks and through

this

essay, I will explain it in detail.

To begin

with, a large number of people tend to pay for anything using their phone these days as it is efficient

due to

less physical money use.

For instance

, the Indonesian government

last

year launched QRIS as a new

payment

method.

As a result

, Indonesians do not need to withdraw money from the machine.

Furthermore

, based on the current survey,

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

states that above half of the inhabitants support

this

technological advancement in terms of convenience.

Hence

, what the Indonesian government has done is

able

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

to ease individuals' needs in terms of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

payment

efficiency.

In addition

, some apps currently provide discounts

while

purchasing certain products that they have in order to benefit the public.

This

is a decent chance to minimise their expenditure, so they will take it. One clear example is that the QRIS on Shopee offers a huge number of vouchers if an individual buys McD meals. The more people spend their money, the more advantages they will obtain.

Therefore

, using a

payment

benefits them

in other words

To conclude

, the number of plus points for

this

phenomenon is higher than the negative sides and I strongly agree with that.

Submitted by 2024successielts on Tue Dec 05 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

To achieve a better score in coherence and cohesion, ensure that your ideas are organized more logically, with clear paragraphing, and that each paragraph follows a clear central theme. Use a wider range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to start each paragraph, guiding the reader through your argument.

Task Achievement

For task achievement, expand on the ideas presented to fully answer the question. While you provided an opinion and relevant examples, ensure to cover both advantages and disadvantages more comprehensively if asked to discuss them. It is essential to demonstrate an ability to present a balanced view when required by the task.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

247 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Contactless transactions
Mobile wallet
Biometric authentication
Fraud prevention
Digital divide
Cybersecurity
Financial inclusion
Spending habits
E-wallet
Encryption
Digital literacy
Payment gateway

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In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone app is becoming increasingly common. Does these development have more advantages or disadvantages?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

Is there any value in studying academic subjects that are not 'useful' in terms of generating wealth for the country? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Countries with a long average working day are likely to be more economically successful than other countries, but many suffer some negative social-consequences as a result. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is reducing the amount of maximum speed of vehicles. Others think that other ways exist. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. เริ่ม 12:40

Fossil fuel is the main source of energy. In some countries, the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. Is this a positive or negative development?