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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (20 mins.)

The graph below shows different sources of air pollutants in the UK from 1990 to 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. (20 mins.)
#sources #air #pollutants #uk #summarise #information #features #comparisons #mins
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The line graph illustrates information about three various types of resources which took part in
Use synonyms
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
pollution
Use synonyms
 process in the UK over the given
15
Add a hyphen
15-year
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 time period, between 1990 and 2005. Units are measured in
million
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tonnes
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
terms of
air
Use synonyms
pollutants
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,
industry
Add an article
the industry
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced the highest proportion of
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 process
while
Linking Words
 households and transport
were stay
Change the verb form
were stayed
were staying
show examples
 at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
below 2
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 of
air
Use synonyms
pollutants
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 given the
15
Add a hyphen
15-year
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 time zone. Both 3 different types of
air
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pollution
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 resources declined dramatically from 1990 to 2005
year
Use synonyms
, respectively. On the one hand, the amount of
pollution
Use synonyms
 by industry resources was seen a
sharply
Change the adverb
sharp
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 decrease till
1999
Change the article
the 1999
show examples
year
Use synonyms
,
approximately
Change preposition
with approximately
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 3
million
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tonnes
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 of
pollution
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. After 6 years,
this
Linking Words
 figure stayed at 4
million
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tonnes
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 till 2002,
then
Linking Words
 it
ent
Correct your spelling
went
show examples
 down slightly.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the transport consumption
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
fluctuated
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same range ,
such
Linking Words
 as 1.5 and 2
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
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 of
air
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pollutants
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 during the whole
year
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 period. Turning to
households
Change the noun form
household
show examples
 figures, for the first 9
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year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
, the amount of
pollution
Use synonyms
 measured in the same stage,
while
Linking Words
 it fell to 0.5
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
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 of
air
Use synonyms
pollutants
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, approximately. Following
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
, the total
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 accounted
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
sharp decrease in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
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, over 15
year
Use synonyms
 period.
Submitted by babayeva.ilayda on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words air, pollution, year, million, tonnes, pollutants with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • air pollutants
  • emissions
  • decrease
  • increase
  • stable
  • fluctuate
  • trend
  • peak
  • drop
  • significant
  • legislation
  • technological advancements
  • comparative analysis
  • contributors
  • households
  • transport
  • industry
  • regulation
  • pattern
  • anomaly
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