The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is said that the fundamental purpose of
science
should be to develop people’s
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. I totally agree with
this
because
science
can advise you by new numerous insights
of
Change preposition
into
show examples
environmental and
food
productions
Change the noun form
production
show examples
problems and improve the
overall
prosperity of communities.
Science
has plentiful hidden gems to
give
Verb problem
apply
show examples
impacts
Correct subject-verb agreement
impact
show examples
and reform people’s lives for the better
live
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in many ways,
such
as environmental improvements. Through scientific research and development, revolutionary exploration has been
remodel
Wrong verb form
remodelled
show examples
for
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
understanding
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
what environmental conditions are
such
as earthquake detection
technology
, weather forecasting, and
improve
Verb problem
apply
show examples
better indicators of climate
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
show examples
.
Furthermore
,
science
can
be play
Change the verb form
play
show examples
vital
Add an article
a vital
show examples
role
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
food
productions
Change the noun form
production
show examples
problems. Nowadays,
researcher
Fix the agreement mistake
researchers
show examples
try
Wrong verb form
are trying
show examples
to find better ways to make sure people in the world have a
sustainability
Replace the word
sustainable
show examples
food
stock properly. They try to check land conditions, counting and predicting how
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
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food
exactly
that
Correct word choice
apply
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we need for our life, and how
about
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people can live in the future with
food
. They start to know more from upstream to downstream. All of them
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
about
technology
. It is important
also
for governments to invest in
science
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
in
technology
.
Science
will give you
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
perspective or model about what is happening and how you can solve it
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
technology
. It is said that the crucial objective of
science
should be to make people have better conditions in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. In conclusion, I totally agree with
this
because
science
can give you new insight about happening situations and try to
analyst
Replace the word
analyse
show examples
what we can do to solve the situation.
Moreover
, for environmental or climate change and sustainability
food
production. Without
science
Add a comma
science,
show examples
we never get new insight and we never know how to solve the problem efficiently and effectively.
Submitted by jehanboo on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay indicates an overall good structure with an introduction and a conclusion present, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. To enhance your coherence and cohesion, consider linking your thoughts more naturally and using a wider variety of cohesive devices such as conjunctions, topic sentences, and synonyms to avoid repetition.
task achievement
Your response to the task is adequate; you have expressed agreement with the statement and provided reasons for it. To improve, make sure to expand upon these reasons with detailed examples and thorough explanations. Incorporate specific instances where science has directly improved people's lives to support your viewpoint more convincingly.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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