The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Science plays a vital role in today's lives. The life of an individual can be improved with technique which is a crucial aim of art. I totally agree with the given statement. In the above essay, I would like to decide the points with an example and a conclusion. To commence with, in the present contemporary era, information has taken place.The improvement in people's daily lives is through the use of scientific technology. To elaborate, many scientific inventions have been created in the universe for the past many years which helped the public in many ways.
For instance
, the establishment of computers is considered to be the best thing as they play an important role in the life of office workers.
Moreover
, electronic devices made it easier for students during the coronavirus period to continue studying from home.
Furthermore
, scientists are performing experiments and exploring new ideas on a daily basis. Mainly the scientific works are based on space exploration. To explicate, scientists should be more focused on improving individual growth than any other projects.
For example
, innovations like renewable energy technologies, affect waste management and sustainable agricultural practices can be developed.
To sum up
, the central aim of art should be the betterment of the human soul. It should play a role in advancing health and enhancing the
overall
quality of public activity.
Submitted by cixoxi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The essay contains multiple structural and grammatical inconsistencies. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea followed by supporting examples or evidence. Transitional phrases should be used to create a natural flow between ideas.
task achievement
The essay lacks full development of ideas and does not address the task prompt directly. Ensure that your argument directly answers the question, and provide well-developed examples that are directly tied to the central claim of the essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: