The leaders of most organizations tend to be older people. However, some argue that younger people make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#leaders #organizations #people #argue #bosses

Most organization leaders are to be older.

On the other

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

other

people

that younger employees make better managers . I state my opinion on the following points . From the on side . Older

people

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

more knowledge than younger . For

this

always older

people

are to be boss. It could be because they are who are managers

need

Correct pronoun usage

who need

show examples

a lot of

excperiense

Correct your spelling

experience

experiences

I think older

people

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

enough

excperiense

Correct your spelling

experience

From

Change preposition

show examples

the other side . Sometimes

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

older

people

are

boss

Correct article usage

the boss

show examples

in their house in the world.

For example

my father boss in my house . Because he is older than others. For

this

leader

Fix the agreement mistake

leaders

show examples

are to be older to kind of companies and

othet

Correct your spelling

other

unions .

Submitted by doniyorgafurov05 on Wed Dec 13 2023

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introduction conclusion present

Your essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are crucial for structuring your argument effectively. Make sure to include these paragraphs and clearly state your viewpoint in the introduction and summarize it in the conclusion.

logical structure

The essay does not exhibit a clear logical structure. Use paragraphs effectively, each containing one main idea with supporting sentences that expand on that idea. Transitions between paragraphs need to be smooth and logical.

supported main points

Your main points are not fully developed or supported by specific examples. When presenting an argument, be sure to back up each point with evidence or examples to strengthen your essay.

complete response

Your response to the question is incomplete. To fully address the task, make sure to answer all parts of the question and develop a more balanced argument discussing both viewpoints before giving your own opinion.

clear comprehensive ideas

Your ideas need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Work on expanding and elaborating on your thoughts so the reader can understand your perspective. It would be beneficial to practice writing more complex sentences that convey your ideas unambiguously.

relevant specific examples

The essay could benefit from more relevant and specific examples. Examples help to clarify and support your arguments, thereby making your essay stronger and more convincing. Try to draw from a wider range of experiences or hypothetical scenarios when providing examples.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

121 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

strategic decision-making
crisis management
innovative ideas
adaptable
tech-savvy
digital transformation
complex situations
high-pressure decisions
empathy
patience
strategic foresight
authoritative
collaborative work culture
dynamic
inclusive organizational culture
ageism

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The leaders of most organizations tend to be older people. However, some argue that younger people make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries today, many people decide to have their first child when they are older. Why? Is it a positive or negative phenomenon?

Some people believe that after the child begins his/her schooling their teachers will have more influence than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+