The obesity rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many developed countries. discuss some possible reasons for this problem and suggest solutions

#obesity #rate #teenagers #countries

I completely discuss

with

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apply

show examples

the provided statement for some reasons and my inclinations

along with

relevant

exampe

Correct your spelling

example

examples

will be discussed in the following paragraphs the obesity rate among adults has increased dramatically in many developed

world

Change to a plural noun

worlds

show examples

. Looking

firstly

at one side of

this

statement

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

this

the obesity rate

harm

Wrong verb form

is harmful

show examples

for

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show examples

people

because it is gastric flu .the result for a majority

people

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of people

show examples

got

Verb problem

apply

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bad ills . On the one hand , if

people

Add a missing verb

have a

show examples

lot of

food

, it maybe will be gastrites

Correct your spelling

although

people

make a wish a majority

food

.and

Correct your spelling

and

as a result

population growth will decrease . Turning to

the

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apply

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another point of

this

statement , in my opinion,

people

useful

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

eat delicious

food

. The reason

for

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apply

show examples

population

Correct article usage

the population

show examples

a lot eat

food

, more becoming healthy.

On the other hand

, junk

food

is makes

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

you fat. In conclusion, I think eat less

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apply

show examples

food

as much as possible as

its

Correct your spelling

it is

show examples

unhealthy

Correct article usage

an unhealthy

show examples

snack

Submitted by dildoraumrzoqova3 on Wed Dec 13 2023

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Structure

Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, introducing the topic and summarizing the main points at the end.

Content

Develop your main points with supporting details and examples, and make sure they relate directly to the task questions.

Cohesion

Organize ideas logically, use paragraphs effectively, and employ linking words to connect ideas and paragraphs.

Task Response

Fully address all parts of the task, presenting a clear position throughout the response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

159 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

dramatically
prevalence
addictive
sedentary lifestyle
screen time
gadgets
exertion
awareness
balanced diet
incorporate
nutritional education
facilitating
impose
regulations
restricting
promote

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The obesity rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many developed countries. discuss some possible reasons for this problem and suggest solutions

Fully explain your ideas

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the best way to run a business is within the family, while others find a family-run business unsuccessful. Discuss both opinions and present your own.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+