Some countries have free health services. However, some people feel that those who live unhealthy lifestyles should not receive free healthcare. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

#countries #health #services #people #lifestyles #healthcare

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Dear Mr. Tom, I am writing to ask for

time

off from work. On account of our significant family event.

This

event is very important for me because my sister will get married next week. I would appreciate it if you could allow me forward a week . I am Kxaydarkulova Maftuna your international company as

functionary

Correct article usage

a functionary

show examples

have been working

since

Change preposition

for

show examples

five years.

However

I for the first

time

request

time

off from you. I understand that my absence may cause some inconvenience ,so I have already talked to one of our

collagues

Correct your spelling

colleagues

and she agreed to work for me. I hope you will consider my request positively and I assure you that I will do everything in my power to ensure a smooth and efficient transition during my absence. Thank you for your

time

and understanding. I look forward to

you

Change the pronoun

your

show examples

response. Yours sincerely Maftuna Kxaydarkulova

Submitted by vaziramuhammadsobirova on Thu Dec 14 2023

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task achievement

The written text is a personal letter requesting time off work and does not address the IELTS essay topic regarding free health services for individuals with unhealthy lifestyles. To improve your score, ensure that your essay directly responds to the task prompt provided. Clearly state your position on the topic and develop your argument with relevant points and examples.

logical structure

Your essay lacks a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. It's essential to structure your essay with these components to guide the reader logically through your argument. Begin with an introductory statement that paraphrases the question and presents your thesis. Follow this with body paragraphs that each introduce a main point with a topic sentence, then develop that point with explanations or examples. Conclude by summarizing your arguments and restating your position.

logical structure

The letter does not provide a clear and logical progression of ideas related to the IELTS topic in question. To improve coherence and cohesion, start by outlining your main points before you begin writing. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and include cohesive devices such as linking words or phrases to connect your ideas. Maintain consistency in your argument throughout the essay and clearly transition between points.

supported main points

To ensure that all main points are well-supported, include explanations, examples, or evidence that directly relate to your position on the IELTS essay topic. In this case, your letter does not provide any support for your view on health services because it discusses an unrelated personal matter. Next time, be sure to directly address the essay question, providing specific reasons and examples to back up your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

147 words

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Some countries have free health services. However, some people feel that those who live unhealthy lifestyles should not receive free healthcare. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Fully explain your ideas

In today's very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed.among the skills do you think is more important, social skills or good qualification?

Television Sporting shows such as the Olympics motivatethe youth who do not like to exercise much. Do you agree or disagree? Include relevant examples in your answer and provide your own opinion.

some people believe that it is good to shere as much information as possible in scintific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace in the future. Others think the true function of a university is to provide access to knowledge for its own sake. What do you think are the main functions of a university?