A country's future depends on it's young people. Therefore, a country should invest heavily in its youth. Do you agree or disagree?

The given pie charts illustrate five different major sources namely : oil natural gas coal hydroelectric
power
in 1980 and 1990
It is clear that
Oil is the main type of
power
in both years Other sources were differently divided and hydroelectric
power
and coal used the lowest
amount
in the USA. In both years oil showed the significantly the highest
amount
of using sources 42% and 33%. The
amount
of natural gas in the US ranked second with about a quarter In 1980 the US used 22 percent of coal in
power
generation
By contrast
The usage of coal slightly increased by 5% percent.27% In detail Hydroelectric
power
did not change in both years It showed the lowest
amount
of
power
at
5percent
Correct your spelling
5 per cent
In contrast
Nuclear
power
twice increased from
5%to
Correct your spelling
5 to
10% #Dilshodbek #day8 #task1
Submitted by bekzodeshonjonovv on

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logical structure
The response lacks a proper introduction and conclusion, which are essential components of a well-structured essay. It is imperative to start with an introductory paragraph that outlines the topic and your stance on it, followed by body paragraphs that present arguments and examples to support your position, and conclude with a summary that reinforces your main points and restates your opinion.
introduction conclusion present
The essay demonstrates poor logical sequencing and paragraphing. To improve coherence and cohesion, you should organize your ideas in a logical manner, use transitional phrases to connect ideas, and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea with relevant supporting details.
supported main points
To receive a higher score in coherence and cohesion, the main points need to be developed with more supporting information, and each idea should be linked more clearly and coherently to the next. Adequate examples and explanations to back up your claims will also enhance your essay.
complete response
The task achievement is low because the essay does not fully address the prompt provided, which is about investing in youth for a country's future. Instead, the content inappropriately discusses energy sources, thus failing to answer the question posed. Ensure you are addressing the correct question and providing a full response to what the task requires.
clear comprehensive ideas
While some ideas are presented in the essay, they do not pertain to the provided topic. Ensure that your essay is focused on the task at hand and that you develop clear and comprehensive ideas relevant to the argument you are making.
relevant specific examples
Relevant and specific examples are crucial for supporting your argument. Your essay should include such examples that directly relate to the topic of investing in youth for the future success of a country. The examples provided in the essay are not relevant to this topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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