Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas.
Existance
of Correct your spelling
Existence
Correct article usage
the poors
poors
damages both groups, the rich and the poor. Over the Correct your spelling
poor
last
decades
we can see powerful Add a comma
decades,
countries
are trying to protect and help developing countries
. They are insisting on
that all Change preposition
apply
countries
should be developed and the power should be balanced between them. It is obvious that countries
help each other, especially poorers
to make Correct your spelling
poorer
this
balance. I think it is an excellent idea, poorer countries
will be improved and world
dicipline
can be handled easier. I believe it helps poorer economies to stay Correct your spelling
discipline
well
as Rephrase
as well
western
Capitalize word
Western
countries
are
.
In an imaginary Unnecessary verb
apply
world
without any international help and communication, we can not expect that
all Correct word choice
apply
countries
baheve
well with their people. There would be no human Verb problem
to behave
right
in most Fix the agreement mistake
rights
countries
, because on one
hand, after a Correct article usage
the one
while
kings or presidents would be addicted to power and lose their mind
, and Fix the agreement mistake
minds
on the other hand
, people will not obey their government because they are former and uneducated human kind
. It is a dark spot which causes Correct your spelling
humankind
violance
and war and in Correct your spelling
violence
long
Correct article usage
the long
term
no Add a comma
term,
countries
will be safe.
Fix the agreement mistake
country
Additionally
, in an isolated world
, when countries
resist to help
each other, disease and viruses, that are caused by nature or Change the verb form
helping
human
, would make a Fix the agreement mistake
humans
dsaster
for poorer Correct your spelling
disaster
countries
and if richer countries
will not handle and execute these kind
of worldwide spreads, maybe it would have been in all Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
countries
and bother richers
too. Correct your spelling
riches
richer
That is
why the World
Helath
Organization Correct your spelling
Health
established
.
Another reason that developed Add a missing verb
was established
countries
want to communicate and help third
Add a hyphen
third-world
world
countires
is that they want to sell their products. Industrial Correct your spelling
countries
countries
need to sell the products, so they need customers and the third world
countries
, which have higher
population, is Add an article
a higher
great
market for them. If poor Add an article
a great
countries
can not buy products from them, industries will be closed and destroyed. For
this
reason, powerful countries
are trying to help poor countries
to stay update
and develop them Wrong verb form
updated
for
Change preposition
to
maikng
demand. It helps the flow of money in international Correct your spelling
making
sclae
.
Correct your spelling
scale
Overall
, I agree with helping poorer countries
from first world
countries
, because all countries
are important for our world
mechanism, some of them are producing agriculture and supply our food like Correct article usage
the Netherland
Netherland
and Ukraine, and some of them make facilities for us like industrial Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
countries
such
as Germany. All are important because the existance
of these Correct your spelling
existence
countries
depend
on low or Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
same level
Add a hyphen
same-level
countries
and they knew that, so they have
established Unnecessary verb
apply
World
Bank.Correct article usage
the World
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacked a clear and coherent structure, which made the flow of ideas somewhat challenging to follow. To improve in this area, consider outlining the main points before writing and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Introductions and conclusions are essential to signal the beginning and end of your argument clearly.
task achievement
To address the task more completely, make sure to explicitly relate your arguments to the prompt. This means clearly stating how health, education, and trade improvements can contribute to the development of poorer nations and the role of richer nations in this process. Use specific examples to substantiate your points. Additionally, conclusions should link back to the prompt, reinforcing how your discussion relates to the question at hand.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.