IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays many people choose to be self- employed rather than to work for a company or organization. Why it might be the case? What could be the disadvantages if being self-employed?

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Lately,
self employed
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self-employed
show examples
people
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 is becoming
trend
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a trend
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 in many
work
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 environment.
This
Linking Words
 became more apparent after the covid pandemic
force
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forced
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to
work
Use synonyms
 from home. Despite many advantages of being
self employed
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self-employed
show examples
, many disagree with
this
Linking Words
.
One
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 of the most mentioned
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benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
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 of being
self employed
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self-employed
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 is the flexibility of time, worker can adjust their time of
work
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 freely and decide when to
work
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, when to
takes
Wrong verb form
take
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 time off and do something else. With
Linking Words
this
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this,
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 they have more balanced
work
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 and life and
able
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are able
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 to take care of their family and do things they care about. Another
advantages
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advantage
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 is the ability to set your own pay and virtually limitless income,
this
Linking Words
 can be true if
one
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have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 a
very
Rephrase
apply
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unique skill that can be done from home,
usually
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usually,
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this
Linking Words
 comes from
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
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 sector. Being self-employed
require
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requires
show examples
 the ability
of working
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to work
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 independently without supervision, which is not the forte that many
people
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 have, certain kind
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people
Change preposition
of people
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 are unable to
work
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 without supervision and guidance,
hence
Linking Words
, being self-employed is not suitable for
this
Linking Words
 kind of
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people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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. Other than that, being
self-empolyed
Correct your spelling
self-employed
 and
be
Wrong verb form
being
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 your own boss means there is no more financial stability given by
established
Correct article usage
an established
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 company which gives stable income,
one
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have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to do more strict financial planning to cover the living expenses when the hard times
comes
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come
show examples
,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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especially happen to
one
Use synonyms
 who
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 project-based
work
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, another thing to consider when deciding to become self-employed is the loss of
Use synonyms
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 used to be provided by employers,
such
Linking Words
 as healthcare, insurance and pension
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
,
this
Linking Words
benefit
Use synonyms
 when summed can be financially significant to support workers.
Lastly
Linking Words
, self-employed
people
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 have to deal with isolation because they are working alone and rarely makes
connection
Add an article
a connection
the connection
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 with
colleague
Add an article
a colleague
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. It can be concluded that many disadvantages of as self-employed
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 prefer working to an employer.
This
Linking Words
 include the
inablity
Correct your spelling
inability
ability
 to
work
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indepently
Correct your spelling
independently
, no stable income, absence of
benefit
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 given by
employer
Add an article
the employer
an employer
show examples
, and isolation can be hard to deal
.
Change preposition
with.
show examples

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task achievement
You need to ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set the context and state the purpose of the essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be well-developed with relevant examples and explanations. The conclusion should summarize the main points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay by using clear transitions and signposting language to guide the reader through your points. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea that directly relates to the essay question and subsequent sentences should expand on that main idea. Avoid repetition and stay focused on the topic of each paragraph.
task achievement
Include a range of examples that are directly relevant to the topic and help to develop your main points. Specific examples are more convincing than general statements and help to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic. Be sure that each example clearly supports the point you're trying to make in the paragraph.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employed
  • autonomy
  • flexibility
  • work-life balance
  • entrepreneurial spirit
  • financial instability
  • self-motivation
  • benefits
  • job security
  • healthcare
  • retirement plans
  • administrative tasks
  • compliance
  • isolation
  • camaraderie
What to do next:
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