Some people are of the opinion that children should be rewarded for good behaviour. Others think they should be punished for bad behavior. Discuss both views and give your personal opinion and reasons.

#people #children #behaviour #behavior

The education of children has become a debatable topic.

While

some think students should be rewarded for good

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

think they should get

discipline

Wrong verb form

disciplined

show examples

for their bad

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

This

essay will discuss both views and my personal opinion and reasons. On the one hand, positive reinforcement can encourage good

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

by rewarding children when they act appropriately, which can motivate them to maintain

such

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

in the future. Parents or teachers can reward them in various forms

such

as stickers, small prizes or candies which give youngsters motivation to keep good

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

in the long term.

On the other hand

, punishing children when they

misbehavior

Replace the word

misbehave

show examples

will

make

Verb problem

have

show examples

a negative impact on their mental health.

According to

a survey from Hong Kong University, 70% of students experience depression and anxiety because of their shadow of childhood

that

Correct word choice

and

show examples

they get punishment from their parents.

Therefore

they are scared to express themselves. We can see that the effect of punishment will have a huge negative impact on a child. In conclusion, rewarding adolescents would lead them to be good behaviour person.

In contrast

, punishment is not the best way to correct their

misbehavior

Change the spelling

misbehaviour

show examples

Submitted by callachan8 on Mon Dec 18 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction and Conclusion

Ensure that your introduction sets a clear foundation for the discussion by directly addressing the topic and outlining the structure of the essay. Additionally, ensure your conclusion effectively summarizes your main arguments and clearly states your position.

Supported Main Points

Develop your main points with clear explanations and relevant examples. Each viewpoint should be explored fully, ideally with supporting evidence or real-life examples to substantiate your claims.

Complete Response

Aim for a balanced argument where both sides are presented before you state your personal opinion. Make sure your personal opinion is clearly stated and well-supported by reasons and examples from your text.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on the progression of ideas to enhance the reader's understanding. Use a range of cohesive devices accurately and effectively to bring about better flow and coherence in your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

191 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Positive reinforcement
Behavioral motivation
Praise
Extrinsic motivation
Internal discipline
Consequences
Time-outs
Removal of privileges
Logical consequences
Psychological effects
Child-parent relationship
Negative reinforcement
Consistency
Fairness

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Some people think that video games are advantageous, while others believe video games are harmful to the people who play them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In the contemporary epoch, some individuals believe that virtual games have several benefits; in contrast, other people argue that these types of games have many drawbacks for the people who employ them.
6
band
You are a student at an English language school in Brighton and are living in private accommodation with other flatmates. You have not had hot water or heating for some time. The landlord’s workmen have tried to fix the problem but without success. Write a letter to the landlord. In your letter, state your reason for writing describe the problems and explain how you feel propose a solution and risk the landlord to take action
I am writing to notify you of an issue, concerning the non-availability of hot water and faulty room heaters that is causing us discomfort and hindering our peaceful stay at your premises.
5
band
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?
As everyone agrees learning to foreign tongues has been one of the significant topics for society for years. In light of this fact , It can be clearly seen a few group individuals think that career development , moving to another country and working in higher departments are possible with a foreign language and they sustain their learning journey step by step. Nevertheless, a part of the community does not possess the same awareness , thus, they seem to have failed in education which can assist in learning skills.As a consequence, a part of the community thinks that these people encountered various drawbacks. I tend to be on the same wavelength with this idea . In the following parts, I will try to explain , why I am a supporter of this view.
8
band
University students must pay all tuition fees, because it benefits mostly them individually, rather than the society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that college students have a responsibility to fund their own tuition fees due to the minimum contribution to society afterwards. This essay disagrees with the statement because people with a higher degree can help the government to create some innovations for a better country and increase the employment rate through entrepreneurship.
4
band
Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. can artificial intelligence enhace the learning experience? Is it a positive or negative development?
teaching online is obtaining more and more advanced technology. This writer believes that artificial intelligencecould improve study process significantly by sing the internetand this advantage is cetanly a positive upgrade due to its reliability.

Some people are of the opinion that children should be rewarded for good behaviour. Others think they should be punished for bad behavior. Discuss both views and give your personal opinion and reasons.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that video games are advantageous, while others believe video games are harmful to the people who play them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

University students must pay all tuition fees, because it benefits mostly them individually, rather than the society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. can artificial intelligence enhace the learning experience? Is it a positive or negative development?