Some people feel that entertainers(eg.film stars,pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

#people #entertainers #eg #film #stars #pop #musicians #sports #money #job

Now-a-days entertainers are getting more

money

for their work.

Example

: film

stars

,pop musicians or sports

stars

are paid too much

money

.Yes, I gree to

this

details.Recently released leo movie in theatres.The leo movie box office collection was above 600 crore.In that movie,actor vijay got 120crore as a salary. The film industries are varying with it's language.

Example

: Hollywood,Bollywood,Tollywood,Kollywood,Webseries are there.The Hollywood actor and actress are getting more salary.Because worldwide box office collection was more and more.Because in their movies VFX charge is more. K-pop from

korea

was most familiar in

this

world.Pop musicians getting more

money

through youtube.

Korea

is having 2types of teams.One is North

Korea

and another one is South

korea

pop musicians.

Example

: Blackpink is most famous youtube team in

this

world.They are having more folklowers compare to others on youtube.

Also

sports

stars

are having more followers on social medis.Sports

stars

Example

: IPL players are paid too much

money

for each season.

Example

: The IPL

Stars

are getting above 20crores per season. Information technology team people getting more

money

.Who is doing Gold,Diamond business? That people getting more income.In a temple side,Tirupathy Temple is getting more and more

money

and Gold from devotees.And

also

Liquor that based on the Government earning more amount from the liquor drinkers.Who and all exporting petrol,diesel,edible things

also

getting more

money

.Now-a-days engieers that who involved in robotics and it's related field that people earning more

money

.And

also

builders that engineers and doctor's

also

getting more income.

Example

: Surgeons getting more

money

for their work.

Submitted by insighttribez on Tue Dec 19 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your essay has a clear structure with an introductory paragraph, at least two or three main body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have one clear main idea or argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on linking your ideas more effectively. Use a range of linking words to connect sentences and paragraphs so that the reader can follow your argument.

task achievement

Attempt to cover the prompt in a more detailed and nuanced way. Address the question directly and ensure that your opinion is clear throughout the essay.

task achievement

Provide clear and relevant examples to support your main points. Make sure the examples are directly related to the points you are making and the essay question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

246 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
You work for international company and you need time off to attent a family celebration.Write a letter to company's manager.In your letter: Give details of celebration Explain why you need time off Suggest a way to have your work done during that time.
I am writing this letter to you to request one-week vacation starting from April 1, 2024, ending on April 8, 2024, due to the marriage of my younger sister , which is going to be held at the Palace, Chicago. We have already booked this place for the whole week to conduct all the functions here.
4.5
band
The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do this advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages?
In today's digital age, social media has been developing across the world, and people's relationships and society have seen changes over time. This author believes that the advantages of bringing more opportunities for promoting business and enabling users to communicate quicker overshadowed the drawbacks of getting scammed.
4
band
Many people are choosing to move to cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
Deciding where to live is one of life's difficult choices. While there are both of advantages and disadvantages to move to cities. I believe that for economic and comfortable facility, life in the cities is more beneficial to move in. This is because facilities in the cities can offer more opportunity as well as more affordable cost of living.
5.5
band
The best way to help under-achieving pupils is to have compulsory after school activities which they must attend. This way they will become more involved in schools and their grades will improve. To what extent do you agree?
Nowadays it is believed by some people that to enhance pupil's grades and to make them involved in the spirit of schools, it is needed to create mandatory activities that they must visit. In my opinion, it could be beneficial in some way, however, it is also could badly affect on mental health.
<4
band
The information about shopping on the Internet sales between 2003 and 2013 in New Zealand has changed a lot. Do you agree with this statement?
The pie chart gives information about shopping on the Internet sales between 2003 and 2013 in New Zealand.

Some people feel that entertainers(eg.film stars,pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other types of job should be highly paid?

Fully explain your ideas

You work for international company and you need time off to attent a family celebration.Write a letter to company's manager.In your letter: Give details of celebration Explain why you need time off Suggest a way to have your work done during that time.

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do this advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people are choosing to move to cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

The best way to help under-achieving pupils is to have compulsory after school activities which they must attend. This way they will become more involved in schools and their grades will improve. To what extent do you agree?

The information about shopping on the Internet sales between 2003 and 2013 in New Zealand has changed a lot. Do you agree with this statement?