IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The maps below show an industrial area in the town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The maps below show an industrial area in the town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two plans indicate the changes that are going to be done in Norbition’s industrial area. In general, the factories will be replaced by houses and there will be more infrastructures that a living site needs.
According to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the figure, all the factories are going to be closed down and destroyed,
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 of them, it is planned to build some places for
residence
Replace the word
residents

The word residence doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
 all over the area.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the farmland on the north side of the river will be transferred to the northeast and will be replaced by housing. As can be seen, in the matter of infrastructure, the roads are going to be extended to bring vast access to the different parts;
moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there will be a bridge over the river, which leads to the buildings on the north side of it.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, on the south side of the central square, some shops and a health centre are going to be built on both sides of the path.
Last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 but not least, on the eastern half of the site, there will be a
spece
Correct your spelling
space

If you don’t want spece to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

for playing and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 it is planned to build
school
Add an article
a school
the school

The noun phrase school seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • industrial area
  • planned future development
  • factories
  • warehouses
  • railway line
  • shopping center
  • residential buildings
  • college
  • mixed-use zone
  • commercial
  • residential
  • educational
  • green spaces
  • pedestrian walkways
  • housing
  • community
  • retail services
  • revitalize
  • quality of life
  • vibrant
  • sustainable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: