Some people believe that goverments should fund and promote artistic and cultural activities for their citizens. Others, however, think that these activities should be left to private individuals and institutions. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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Art is an essential part of human life. Art is not only for entertaining
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also
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but also
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a tool to deliver
messages
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such
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as traditional things.
Therefore
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, artistic and cultural
activities
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for a country to make its
citizens
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throughout generations
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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know about their culture.
Thus
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, there are various funds from
governments
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and private individuals and institutions to promote these practices. Each of
sponsorships
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the sponsorships
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has its own
strenghs
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strengths
and benefits.
Firstly
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, it is common for
governments
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to fund and boost artistic
and
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apply
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activities
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related to their culture to the
citizens
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.
This
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is because the
governments
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have solid resources to support these
activities
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with wider
channel
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channels
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to deliver and can reach more
people
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.
For instance
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,
a
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apply
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traditional
activities
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can be celebrated yearly and
broadcasted
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broadcast
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nationwide through
news
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the news
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,
therefore
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, more
people
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will get to know them. Since the
governments
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are in charge, the
governments
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can control the
messages
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and information regarding
to
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apply
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thr
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the
cultures which they want to pass on to the
citizens
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.
On the other hand
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, private individuals and institutions may promote artistic and cultural
activities
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in
the
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apply
show examples
ways that are more creative and profitable.
For example
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, the private parties would use different methods to deliver information about farming culture to their audiences through music, performances or
patinings
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paintings
.
This
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allows
messages
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to get
closers
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closer
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to different types of
people
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based on their interests.
Morever
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Moreover
, products
are
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apply
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made
from
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by
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farmers can
also
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be sold at any places that are open to
the
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apply
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tourists, which will bring financial benefits to local
citizens
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. In my opinion, both government and private parties should fund and promote artistic and cultural
activities
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as the
messages
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and information will be
ultilized
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utilised
.
While
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the
governments
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ensure their
citizens
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know about traditional
activities
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throughout, individuals and institutions play their parts in bringing them closer to
people
Use synonyms
with different interests.
Submitted by thanhvan230688 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay provides a recognizable structure, but transitions between ideas could be smoother. Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs and make certain that each sentence logically follows from the one before. It's critical to guide the reader through your progression of thought without abrupt changes.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task adequately by discussing both views and providing an opinion. Improve by developing a clearer overall position throughout the essay, ensuring that your opinion is consistent and well integrated at every stage of the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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