Some people believe that goverments should fund and promote artistic and cultural activities for their citizens. Others, however, think that these activities should be left to private individuals and institutions. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #goverments #fund #activities #citizens #individuals #institutions

Art is an essential part of human life. Art is not only for entertaining

also

Correct word choice

but also

show examples

a tool to deliver

messages

such

as traditional things.

Therefore

, artistic and cultural

activities

for a country to make its

citizens

throughout generations

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

know about their culture.

Thus

, there are various funds from

governments

and private individuals and institutions to promote these practices. Each of

sponsorships

Correct article usage

the sponsorships

show examples

has its own

strenghs

Correct your spelling

strengths

and benefits.

Firstly

, it is common for

governments

to fund and boost artistic

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

activities

related to their culture to the

citizens

This

is because the

governments

have solid resources to support these

activities

with wider

channel

Fix the agreement mistake

channels

show examples

to deliver and can reach more

people

For instance

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

traditional

activities

can be celebrated yearly and

broadcasted

Wrong verb form

broadcast

show examples

nationwide through

news

Correct article usage

the news

show examples

therefore

, more

people

will get to know them. Since the

governments

are in charge, the

governments

can control the

messages

and information regarding

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

thr

Correct your spelling

the

cultures which they want to pass on to the

citizens

On the other hand

, private individuals and institutions may promote artistic and cultural

activities

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

ways that are more creative and profitable.

For example

, the private parties would use different methods to deliver information about farming culture to their audiences through music, performances or

patinings

Correct your spelling

paintings

This

allows

messages

to get

closers

Correct your spelling

closer

show examples

to different types of

people

based on their interests.

Morever

Correct your spelling

Moreover

, products

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

made

from

Change preposition

show examples

farmers can

also

be sold at any places that are open to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

tourists, which will bring financial benefits to local

citizens

. In my opinion, both government and private parties should fund and promote artistic and cultural

activities

as the

messages

and information will be

ultilized

Correct your spelling

utilised

While

the

governments

ensure their

citizens

know about traditional

activities

throughout, individuals and institutions play their parts in bringing them closer to

people

with different interests.

Submitted by thanhvan230688 on Wed Dec 20 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay provides a recognizable structure, but transitions between ideas could be smoother. Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs and make certain that each sentence logically follows from the one before. It's critical to guide the reader through your progression of thought without abrupt changes.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task adequately by discussing both views and providing an opinion. Improve by developing a clearer overall position throughout the essay, ensuring that your opinion is consistent and well integrated at every stage of the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that goverments should fund and promote artistic and cultural activities for their citizens. Others, however, think that these activities should be left to private individuals and institutions. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

scientists should stop using animals as experiments . discuss both views

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of this. How can we deal with those causes

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Scientists tell us some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+