The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time
The two bar
chart
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charts
show examples
indiacates
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indicate
the number of people who do
full
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full-time
show examples
time
and
part
-
time
education
during three periods in Britain. The y-axis depicts the years they took
the
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their
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education
and
x-axis
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the x-axis
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shows the number of people. The male
chart
shows that graphs
is
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are
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slighty
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slightly
constant
regaring
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regarding
the
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apply
show examples
full
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full-time
show examples
time
as well as
the
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apply
show examples
part
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part-time
show examples
time
education
. But the female
chart
shows variations in women
receing
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receiving
receive
both types of
education
.In the male
chart
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
number of men involved in
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
is 1000 and
least
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the least
show examples
part
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part-time
show examples
time
educators
are
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were
show examples
100 people in 1970/91.But almost 1500 women took
part
in
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
during the period 1990/91 and
least
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the least
show examples
numbers in
part
timeducators
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time educators
were below 100 in numbers. In summary over the period of 30 years both men and women were interested in taking
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
than the
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part-time
show examples
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, time, education, part with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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