The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time
The two bar
chart
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charts
show examples
indiacates
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indicate
the number of people who do
full
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full-time
show examples
time
and
part
-
time
education
during three periods in Britain. The y-axis depicts the years they took
the
Change the word
their
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education
and
x-axis
Correct article usage
the x-axis
show examples
shows the number of people. The male
chart
shows that graphs
is
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are
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slighty
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slightly
constant
regaring
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regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
full
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full-time
show examples
time
as well as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
. But the female
chart
shows variations in women
receing
Correct your spelling
receiving
receive
both types of
education
.In the male
chart
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
number of men involved in
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
is 1000 and
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
educators
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
100 people in 1970/91.But almost 1500 women took
part
in
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
during the period 1990/91 and
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
numbers in
part
timeducators
Correct your spelling
time educators
were below 100 in numbers. In summary over the period of 30 years both men and women were interested in taking
full
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full-time
show examples
time
education
than the
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
time
education
Submitted by jennimanu926 on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, time, education, part with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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