The chart below shows the amount of lesiure time enjoyed by men and women of different employment status.
the bar chart depicts the amount of free
time
in a week based on gender and job status from 1998 to 1999. overall
unemployed and retired are the majority who have free time
among the status.
to begin
with, full-time
employed
had free Replace the word
employees
time
about 50 hours
for males and 38 hours
for females in a week. in contrast
, housewives spent a similar amount of hours
with male full-time
employed at 51 hours
respectively. furthermore
, female part-time
employees had 40 hours
for
leisure Change preposition
of
time
.
on the other hand
, unemployed and retired experienced over 80 hours
for males and 75 hours
for females, these figures are the peak on the chart.
to draw the
conclusion, employed full-Correct article usage
a
time
had the least of
leisure Change preposition
apply
time
and unemployed and retired had the highest of
leisure Change preposition
apply
time
.Submitted by syifensaft
on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time, hours with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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