The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The pie chart below illustrates the portion of working time, individuals compartmentalize their time rate on different activities essentially in two divert years 1958 and 2008.

Overall

Linking Words

, In the

year

Use synonyms

1958, working

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percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

and sleeping had a high rate

while

Linking Words

other activities had a low percentage.

In contrast

Linking Words

, in the

year

Use synonyms

2008 working and sleeping were still one top

while

Linking Words

relaxing at home became the third activity. Despite

this

Linking Words

, time working in the

year

Use synonyms

1958 was 33

Use synonyms

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

but had increased by 9

Use synonyms

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in the

year

Use synonyms

2008.

In addition

Linking Words

, sleeping had decreased by 7

Use synonyms

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

Hence

Linking Words

, Going out with friends and family was 19

percent

Use synonyms

in the

year

Use synonyms

1958

whereas

Linking Words

in 2008 had decreased by 13

percent

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, relaxing at home was 8

percent

Use synonyms

in 1958, which increased by 5

percent

Use synonyms

in 2008.

Moreover

Linking Words

, another activity remains the same.

Submitted by alihafiid on Sun Dec 24 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words year, percent with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

140 words

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The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Sews editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Some people suggest that the circumstances of a crime, and the reasons for committing it should be taken into consideration when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city.

Write about the following topic. Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.