Surveillance cameras in banks, offices, shops and streets have been very successful in reducing crime in the workplace and public, but they are also took for their users to spy on people's private business. what problems do surveillance cameras create? what are the solutions?
way to spy on people.
There are several issues that surveillance
camera
Fix the agreement mistake
cameras
show examples
produce.
Firstly
Linking Words
,using
this
Linking Words
type of
camer
Correct your spelling
camera
at work
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
to be privet and secure with
strong
Add an article
a strong
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password.That will
assisst
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assist
in
protacting
Correct your spelling
protecting
their
praivecy
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privacy
.
Moreover
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,they
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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is not coherently developed. You should work on creating a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and follow logically from one to the next.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are not well-defined or are missing. Make sure to clearly state the topic and your thesis in the introduction, then summarize your points and restate your thesis in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are not adequately supported with examples or explanations. Develop each point with specific details or reasons.
task achievement
Your response is incomplete and does not cover all parts of the task. Make sure to fully address the problems created by surveillance cameras as well as offer solutions to these issues.
task achievement
Your ideas are not communicated clearly or comprehensively. Ensure your essay presents your ideas in a way that is easy to understand and follows a logical progression.
task achievement
The essay lacks relevant and specific examples to illustrate the problems and solutions related to surveillance cameras. Use concrete examples to strengthen your arguments.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
Some people believe that universities should lower their enrollment requirements for poor citizens living in rural areas and wanting to access to university education. In my opinion, I slightly disagree with this notion and the reasons will be outlined in the following paragraphs before reaching my conclusion.
I am writing to bring your attention because the suburb located in Rivervale has been facing some issues with the garbage collection system for about 3 weeks.
It is often said that modern automation for connection is harmful to public affairs. This writer believes that it is not true due to the reason of keeping in touch via social platforms and can be a valuable resource to make new companions.
The juvenile years are indeed a delightful time for the majority of the crowd. However, some people believe that a mature life brings more happiness despite greater burdens. In my opinion, I completely agree with the first statement and I am going to elaborate on both perspectives in forthcoming paragraphs.
It is certainly true that some people prefer to own a pet in their homes. However, not all the effects of this innovation have been positive, although, it has certainly some advantages.