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Writing Samples
Band 5

A teacher's duty is to teach, not to be a parent. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Where does the role of the parent finish and that of the teacher begin?

#teacher #duty #parent #role
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The role of a teacher is primarily to educate the youth and should not be interlinked with the position of parents. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss why I agree with
this
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 notion and form a conclusion. On the one hand, a child is solely their parent’s responsibility. When enrolled within an educational facility, an educator should only be expected to broaden subject matters that relate to school.
For instance
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, Math and English should be demonstrated within
a
Change the article
an
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 institution as
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 these are often concepts that cannot be taught at home.
Moreover
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, when the child is within their own establishment it is the direct responsibility of
family
Correct article usage
the family
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 at home to discipline their offspring. Within the house, they should be encouraged
on
Change preposition
in
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 mannerisms that will benefit their character, like saying please and thank you. Children are a direct representative of their folks,
therefore
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 it is vital that they know right from wrong. To give an example,
a
Change the article
an
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 instructor could present skills that help a young with their spelling,
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
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 if they
behaved
Wrong verb form
behave
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 poorly within the classroom,
then
Linking Words
this
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 behaviour should be corrected by their guardians.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, educators almost equal the role of a parent during the school day. To explain
this
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further
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, perhaps a youth is interested in the arts and
possess
Correct subject-verb agreement
possesses
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 musical attributes,
this
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 can be
encourgaed
Correct your spelling
encouraged
 within the educational building by the adults and
then
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further
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 enhanced at home by the family.
Day care
Correct your spelling
Daycare
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 centres
also
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 instil valuable attributes that can be taken
further
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 into adolescence.
For example
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, toddlers will often learn the importance of sharing items of food within a nursery,
this
Linking Words
 quality of sharing will become second nature to them and carry on into their adult lives. In conclusion, guardians are ultimately responsible for their
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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 and should not expect teachers to go above and beyond their limits for children that are not their own.
Submitted by abeera2012 on

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coherence cohesion
You have presented the main points of your argument. However, the structure of your essay could be improved by using more sophisticated linkage words and creating clearer distinctions between different ideas.
task achievement
Your essay answers the question but it could greatly benefit from more developed ideas and explanations. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea, which is then supported by specific examples or further explanation.
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