The most effective way to solve traffic and transport problems in the cities is to encourage people from cities to live in countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the modern era, traffic
congestions
on the city roads Fix the agreement mistake
congestion
is
Change the verb form
are
the
grave Correct article usage
a
mence
. A part of the society reckon that families should move to villages to reduce Correct your spelling
menace
this
problem meanwhile, others reject the notion. I personally believe that the first testimonial seems to be more accurate and I will explicate the reasons behind this
in upcoming paragraphs along with
the examples. Hence
, will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
To begin
with my viewpoint, the most prominent reason to support the statement is that higher levels of traffic on the highways is
leading to severe ailments Change the verb form
are
to
Change preposition
for
the
humans Correct article usage
apply
whereas
, in the rural areas
the traffic is less and have alot
of open yards covered with flora to get fresh air and avoid diseases. As, protection is always better than cure Correct your spelling
a lot
therefore
, if Add the comma(s)
, therefore
Correct article usage
the poplution
poplution
is shifting from big cities to Correct your spelling
pollution
population
countryside
, it should be promoted wholeheartedly as it could prove a great help to control city pollution. Add an article
the countryside
Moreover
, the population rate of towns is comparatively less than metropolis
Correct your spelling
metropolises
thus
, there are more opportunities to set-up
a small business and grow it later on. Well, if people of metro regions start moving to local villages they can assist in, not only reducing Correct your spelling
set up
congestion
of cities but Correct article usage
the congestion
also
they can generate various work opportunities to
villagers. Needless to say, all these merits stand in Change preposition
for
a
good stead.
Remove the article
apply
Furthermore
, the government of the nation should play a major role in encouring
Correct your spelling
encouraging
ensuring
the
individuals to take the steps to make the country "clean and green." Correct article usage
apply
Likewise
, officals
should conduct some Correct your spelling
officials
seminors
to make the masses aware Correct your spelling
seminars
seniors
about
the disadvantages of residing in congested Change preposition
of
areas
along with
providing them the
Add the preposition
with the
chances
of getting Fix the agreement mistake
chance
the
deals for buying brand new homes at 20% cheaper prices in rural Correct article usage
apply
areas
. For intance
, as per Correct your spelling
instance
the
article 22, Correct article usage
apply
Indian
Correct article usage
the Indian
governement
is providing subsidies to open Correct your spelling
government
business
and buy a car at Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
lower
value for starting enterpreneurships in Add an article
a lower
backwards
Fix the agreement mistake
backward
areas
. The major motive of the regime is to minimise the pressure of people on cities and to get the trouble of pollution under control. On the flip side, certain people feels
that developed Change the verb form
feel
areas
inherit better education level
, highly paid jobs and a better lifestyle. Fix the agreement mistake
levels
Hence
, it is apparent to say why many are against this
trend.
To conclude
, according to
the statements aforementioned above one can reach to logical conclusion that the benefits of migrating to rural areas
are instrumental indeed. Nevertheless
, its potential drawbacks should not be overlooked either.Submitted by ss6802125 on
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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure in your essay, ensure a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph should seamlessly flow into the next with appropriate use of connecting words.
coherence cohesion
Good job on including both introduction and conclusion. Make sure they are succinct and mirror each other in terms of the points made.
coherence cohesion
Your main points require clearer development and support. Each point should be explained with a clear explanation or illustrative example that is relevant to the topic.
task achievement
You have adequately addressed the task by presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, ensure completeness by fully answering all parts of the prompt.
task achievement
Strive for clarity and depth in your ideas. They should be comprehensively developed and relate directly to the topic, contributing to the overall purpose of the essay.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. While you provided some examples, they need to be more directly linked to your main ideas and the prompt.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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