The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

#show #percentage #time #adults #activities #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The graphs illustrate the proportion of

time

Use synonyms

career-men

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career men

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and

career-women

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career women

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spent on various

activities

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in a nation in the

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year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

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1958 and 2008.

Overall

Linking Words

, working has always been the

dominants

Change the noun form

dominant

show examples

activity

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which

Linking Words

then

Add a missing verb

is then

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followed by sleeping. The least popular

activities

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in 1958 were

traveling

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travelling

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to work and playing sports,

whereas

Linking Words

in 2008 the most uncommon

activity

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was going out with friends or family. The most common

activities

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done by the workers were working and sleeping. Working

time

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increased from 33% to nearly half

while

Linking Words

sleeping

time

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decreased from 32% to a quarter.

Moreover

Linking Words

time

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spent

to hang

Change the verb form

hanging

show examples

out with colleagues

were

Correct subject-verb agreement

was

show examples

down from 19% to 6%, which made it the least popular

activity

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in the

year

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2008.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, in the

year

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1958, the least popular

activities

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were commuting to work which was only 2%.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

number jumped to 8% in the

year

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2008 which made it

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

with

Change preposition

show examples

playing sports.

In addition

Linking Words

time

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spent by the workers to relax at home increased significantly from 8% to 13%, which made it the third most popular

activity

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done by the workers in the

year

Use synonyms

2008.

Submitted by nadillamntr on Tue Dec 26 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words time, activities, year, activity with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

184 words

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The pie charts below show the percentage of time working adults spent on different activities in a particular country in 1958 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

"Prevention is better than cure". Out of a country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventive measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people view teenage conflict with their parents a necessary part of growing up, whilst others see it as something negative which should be avoided. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that children should only read academic books. others believe that reading books for entertainment is equally important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In recent years,” responsible tourists” have paid attention to preserving both culture and environmrnt of the places thay visit. However, some poelpe say that it is impossible to be a “responsible tourist”. To what extent do you agree or disagree?