IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
#thw #information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line
graph
Use synonyms
 illustrates data about the population rate in four different nations, staying in Asia between 1970 and 2020, with anticipations from 2030 to 2040. From an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
clearly seen
Add the auxiliary verb
is clearly seen
show examples
 in the
graph
Use synonyms
, Malaysia witnessed the most growth even until the
last
Linking Words
 predicted period.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
Thailand
Change noun form
Thailand's
show examples
 figure showed
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 minor percentage. As the
graph
Use synonyms
demonstrate
Change the verb form
demonstrates
show examples
, Malaysia started with 30
percent
Use synonyms
 in 1970, and it increased dramatically until it reached 75
percent
Use synonyms
 in 2020.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people who were living in Malaysia will experience a substantial rise in 2040. It
will
Verb problem
is
show examples
anticipate
Wrong verb form
anticipated
show examples
 to reach just over 80
percent
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the two obvious figures which witnessed the lowest rate were Indonesia and Thailand, but they grew progressively from about 15 and under 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 1970 to reach approximately 60 and 45, in 2040 as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
expected from the
graph
Use synonyms
, respectively.
Submitted by f201600285 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words graph, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: