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Band 5

The pie charts below show electricity generation by source in New Zealand and Germany in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts below show electricity generation by source in New Zealand and Germany in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #electricity #generation #source #zealand #germany #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The two pie charts emphasise the sources of
electricity
 in New
Zealand
 and
Germany
 in the years
of
Change preposition
apply
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1980 and 2010. In New
Zealand
, the
units
Correct quantifier usage
number of units
show examples
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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increased from 127 to 200 in the years
of
Change preposition
apply
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1980 and 2010. And, In
Germany
also
 the
units
 of
electricity
 were raised from 107 to 214. It is evident that coal was the main source of
electricity
 in New
zealand
Change the capitalization
Zealand
show examples
 and Nuclear generated more
electricity
 in
Germany
. New
Zealand
 utilised coal as a major
electricity
 source in 1980, which is 56
units
. In 2010, it was dramatically increased to 150
units
 in the total of 200
units
. The rest of the
units
 are generated by petroleum, natural gas and hydro. Nuclear contributed only 20
units
 in 1980 for
Germany
. But, it became 155
units
 by the year of 2010. And, the coal remained the same for both years with 28
units
. Other sources include petroleum, natural gas and hydro.
Submitted by kellyanne.henney on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, zealand, germany, units with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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