IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The demand for coaching services has grown significantly in the digital age, with online coaching platforms becoming prevalent. Some now feel online coaching is a superior option to in-person coaching. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the contemporary world, there
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
 a program of online coaching for students
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
 few years and the demand for
this
Linking Words
 method of coaching services has increased dramatically. Some people
belief
Replace the word
believe
show examples
 that
this
Linking Words
 is the best option for students than
in person
Add a hyphen
in-person
show examples
 coaching. I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and in
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will explain the justification to support my belief. The preponderant reason is that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
remote coaching needs some equipment like laptops, Wi-Fi,
smartphones
Correct word choice
and smartphones
show examples
 to attend the classes and many families are not able to afford them.
For instance
Linking Words
, laptops and smartphones are very expensive as they are more than 500 bucks and poor families are not able to afford that cost as they are earning less than $60 dollars a day.
Hence
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 method of coaching class is for rich families' kids as their parents can handle the cost
whereas
Linking Words
 the in-person classes are affordable for all people.
However
Linking Words
, in the method of remote
tutoring
Add a comma
tutoring,
show examples
 the children do not get
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
on one
Correct your spelling
one-on-one
show examples
 tutoring as there are many pupils on screen which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 it difficult for the tutor to give answers
as well
Linking Words
as
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 some of the tutors do not have too much knowledge of the technology.
For example
Linking Words
, my sister was taking the nursing drilling online and it was very difficult for the instructor to handle the technology and to join the class which
waste
Wrong verb form
wasted
show examples
 their ample time
as well
Linking Words
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
she was not able to have a meeting with
teacher
Add an article
the teacher
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 doubts
clearing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
as he was tight in schedule.
Therefore
Linking Words
, online coaching needs some knowledge to handle the stuff and if you do not have it
then
Linking Words
 it will waste your ample time. In conclusion, virtual drilling is
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
 way of learning and teaching as people do not need to go somewhere but it is not a better option than
face to face
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
 instructing because in
directly
Change the word
direct
show examples
 coaching the student can get more attention from the educator.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction
Ensure that you start your essay with a clear introduction paragraph, outlining your main argument. Avoid including reasons or justification for your viewpoint here; these should be explored in the body paragraphs.
cohesion
Develop clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to introduce the main point you will discuss. This helps the reader to understand the direction of your argument.
cohesion
Link your ideas with appropriate transition words and phrases to maintain the flow of your essay. This connects the points seamlessly and aids the reader in following your line of reasoning.
conclusion
Provide clear conclusions that restate your position and summarize the key points discussed in the essay. Avoid introducing new information or arguments in the conclusion.
task response
Directly address the essay prompt and ensure that you are giving a balanced argument when discussing the extent to which you agree or disagree. Include some concessions or a nuanced approach to show the complexity of the issue.
task response
Ensure that your ideas are developed fully with explanations, examples, and details that support your main argument. Each paragraph should elaborate on a single main point.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: