You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job.You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: say why she/he would not enjoy going to college. explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her
Dear Priyanka ,
Hope you are doing well , I
have
received your letter Unnecessary verb
apply
last
week regarding you are looking for advice whether
to go to college or try to get a job.
I am very happy that you always consider me Change preposition
on whether
a
best adviser among your other friends and I would be grateful to get rid of you Change the article
the
from
Change preposition
apply
this
confusion.
Firstly
, Congratulations for get
through your NEET exam for Change preposition
on getting
diploma
in Master in Pharmacy but as you Correct article usage
a diploma
are
already Verb problem
apply
holding
a Bachelor's degree Wrong verb form
hold
of
pharmacy so does not make any sense to attend the college. Change preposition
in
Furthermore
, you would not enjoy the repeatition
of Correct your spelling
repetition
same
course as you have already Change the article
the same
studed
in vast during your graduation.
Correct your spelling
studied
Secondly
, I came to know that your father lost his job last
year at the time of COVID - 19
, so if you will work and earn some money Correct your spelling
COVID-19
then
it would be an advantage for your family too.
As per your qualification
, you should try Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
job
in Add an article
a job
pharma
Correct article usage
a pharma
companies
, that experience will be useful for you in future.
Fix the agreement mistake
company
Still
if you have confusion , please do not hesitate to reach out over Add a comma
Still,
a
phone.
Regards
PCorrect article usage
the
Submitted by preetiaug25 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure the letter has a clear logical structure throughout, with each paragraph smoothly leading into the next. Use transition words to improve the flow.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate, but could be enhanced by a more personalized touch or the use of the friend's name in the closing to mirror the opening.
coherence cohesion
While each paragraph does present a distinct idea, the paragraph structure could be improved for greater impact and clarity. Ideas may be further developed.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task more fully. While the main points are covered, they could be elaborated upon with more specific details and explanations to fully satisfy the prompt.
task achievement
The tone is generally suitable for a letter to a friend, maintaining a balance between formality and informality. Consider using more engaging language and expressions to strengthen the tone.
Structure your letter
A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:
- A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
- The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
- A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)
When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.
All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.