You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job.You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: say why she/he would not enjoy going to college. explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Priyanka , Hope you are doing well , I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
received your letter
last
Linking Words
week regarding you are looking for advice
whether
Change preposition
on whether
show examples
to go to college or try to get a job. I am very happy that you always consider me
a
Change the article
the
show examples
best adviser among your other friends and I would be grateful to get rid of you
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
confusion.
Firstly
Linking Words
, Congratulations
for get
Change preposition
on getting
show examples
through your NEET exam for
diploma
Correct article usage
a diploma
show examples
in Master in Pharmacy but as you
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
already
holding
Wrong verb form
hold
show examples
a Bachelor's degree
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
pharmacy so does not make any sense to attend the college.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, you would not enjoy the
repeatition
Correct your spelling
repetition
of
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
course as you have already
studed
Correct your spelling
studied
in vast during your graduation.
Secondly
Linking Words
, I came to know that your father lost his job
last
Linking Words
year at the time of
COVID - 19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
, so if you will work and earn some money
then
Linking Words
it would be an advantage for your family too. As per your
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
show examples
, you should try
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
in
pharma
Correct article usage
a pharma
show examples
companies
Fix the agreement mistake
company
show examples
, that experience will be useful for you in future.
Still
Add a comma
Still,
show examples
if you have confusion , please do not hesitate to reach out over
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
phone. Regards P
Submitted by preetiaug25 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure the letter has a clear logical structure throughout, with each paragraph smoothly leading into the next. Use transition words to improve the flow.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate, but could be enhanced by a more personalized touch or the use of the friend's name in the closing to mirror the opening.
coherence cohesion
While each paragraph does present a distinct idea, the paragraph structure could be improved for greater impact and clarity. Ideas may be further developed.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task more fully. While the main points are covered, they could be elaborated upon with more specific details and explanations to fully satisfy the prompt.
task achievement
The tone is generally suitable for a letter to a friend, maintaining a balance between formality and informality. Consider using more engaging language and expressions to strengthen the tone.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: