Nowadays many people have easy acess to computers and a large number of children play computer games. what are the negative impacts of playing computer games? what can be done to minimize the bad effect?
There has been a tremendous increase in the number of individuals questioning the bad consequences of playing video
games
for children
. One of the main dangers of this
worrying trend is linked to the deterioration of academic performance at the
schools. Correct article usage
apply
However
, there are solutions readily available to tackle this
issue such
as parents
monitoring their kids
playing duration regularly.
Change noun form
kid's
kids'
To begin
, there is an argument to be made that computer games
consume children
’s time
and distract them away from their school homework. For example
, one-third of parents
in Toronto city reported a markedly increased failing rate for their children
, after they bought them Playstation 5. For
this
reason, it is evident that these games
hold the children
for long hours in front of the computers
screen, Change noun form
computer's
as
a result Correct word choice
and as
drove
their focus away from Wrong verb form
drive
the
Correct article usage
apply
education
. What is more, children
started demonostrating
substantially rising aggressive behaviours with their classmates as reported by their teachers. Correct your spelling
demonstrating
This
being the case, it can be assumed that if children
continue to dedicate more time
with
these Change preposition
to
games
, this
would lead to further
fall in their Correct article usage
a further
education
level, and many could drop out of their school.
In order to resolve this
troubling issue, one viable solution would be for the parents
to regulate their kids
playing Change noun form
kid's
kids'
activity
and control their behaviour. Fix the agreement mistake
activities
For instance
, educating the children
about the importance of their education
and its future impact on their life,
could make them aware of the harmful outcomes of excessive gaming. Remove the comma
apply
Therefore
, it is clear that
parents
have the responsibility to prevent any worsening progression of the situation by discussing the value of the
Correct article usage
apply
education
with their kids. Furthermore
, parents
should also
enroll
their Change the spelling
enrol
children
in various practical workshops to develop their practical skills, as a
result
they Add the comma(s)
result,
are
more interested Wrong verb form
will be
to concentrate
on their future. With Change preposition
in concentrating
this
in mind, there is no doubt that if parents
coordinate with their children
and schedule their gaming time
, this
would prevent any possible negative consequences on
their future.
Change preposition
in
To conclude
, the overwhelming evidence seems to suggest that gaming lowered the
Correct article usage
apply
children
grades at Change noun form
children's
schools
and impaired their success rate in Fix the agreement mistake
school
the
Correct article usage
apply
education
. However
, it is still possible to turn the tide by involving the parents
in controlling their behaviour at homes
and Fix the agreement mistake
home
mointoring
their playing Correct your spelling
monitoring
time
.Submitted by ototonji.ot on
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task achievement
While you have addressed the main points of the topic, there is room for improvement in making your argument more comprehensive. Your ideas need to be developed further with more specific examples and a clearer explanation of how and why the negative impacts occur and what specific measures can be taken to address these problems. To enhance your task achievement score, ensure all parts of the question are fully answered and supported with detailed reasons and examples.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a decent structure, with an introduction and conclusion present. However, to improve coherence and cohesion, focus on organizing your ideas more logically, ensuring each paragraph flows naturally to the next. Make better use of cohesive devices and varying your sentence structures to express your points clearly. This can enhance the reader's understanding and keep their interest throughout your essay. Pay attention to spelling and ensure that all words are used appropriately, as errors such as 'demonostrating' detract from the overall quality of your essay.
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