Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that there are constant traffic jams in many cities around the world. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from owning cars?

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During the
last
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few years, having a private car has been highly popular and it is regarded as a
symble
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symbol
of good prosperity.
As a result
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, the number of
cars
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is
boosting
Verb problem
increasing
show examples
day by day which poses several problems. To my mind,
however
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,
this
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fever plays a vital role in creating heavy
traffic
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in
urbans
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urban
; but it is not the only defining factor.
Also
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, I assume decreasing the cost of public
transportation
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could significantly reduce the usage of private
cars
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.
Firstly
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, obviously rocketing the number of
cars
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accounts for boosting the statistics of
bumper to bumper
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bumper-to-bumper
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traffic
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all around the globe mostly in megacities;
Whereas
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,
cars
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are not the only logic. In some areas, the other reasons namely inappropriate roads, high
concentartion
Correct your spelling
concentration
concentrations
of markets in some regions and unavailability of good public conveyance are responsible for it
specially
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especially
show examples
during rush hours. So, it can be said that car congestion is not exclusively
due to
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increasing the use of private
cars
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. Regarding the solution, the best action
can
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that can
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be done by governments is
developing
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to develop
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the state of various public
transportation
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systems. In more
deatil
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detail
, the number of buses, the
routs
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routes
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they go and the price are imperative parameters which associate with
popularity
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the popularity
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of
this
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method of
transportation
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.
Although
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,
dereasing
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decreasing
the cost sounds illogical at first glance, has
potential
Correct article usage
the potential
show examples
to bring numerous benefits
for
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to
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governments.
That is
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because it heavily
limmits
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limits
the
traffic
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jams in
metropolsis
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metropolis
metropolises
;
moreover
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, it is more eco-friendly. In conclusion, I admit
while
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enthusiasm about purchasing private
cars
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leads to an upturn
into
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in
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the
traffic
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rate,
cars
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are the only main reason
of
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for
show examples
this
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phenomenon.
Furthermore
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, governments
posses
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possess
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this
Correct determiner usage
the
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ability to solve
this
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issue
via
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by
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making public
transportation
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status better.
Submitted by n97.mortazian on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are clearly organized and that each paragraph logically follows from the one before. Some of your points were not fully developed or explained.
task achievement
Work on providing more specific examples to support your points. While you have outlined measures and related impacts, concrete examples or data would strengthen your argument.
language use
Be careful with spelling, grammar, and punctuation, as there are several errors throughout the essay that impact readability.
coherence cohesion
Avoid overly complex or convoluted sentence structures which can confuse the reader. Aim for clarity and conciseness in your writing to enhance coherence.
task achievement
Strive to have a clear position throughout your essay. While you do address the question, your stance could be stated more explicitly from the introduction through to the conclusion.
language use
Try to vary your vocabulary to avoid repetition of words and phrases. This will show a wider range of language and the ability to express ideas more precisely.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rapidly
  • traffic jams
  • car ownership
  • partially true
  • extent
  • infrastructure
  • population density
  • public transportation
  • measures
  • discourage
  • reduce
  • congestion
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