IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major cities with date opedend, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features making comparisons where relevant.

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major cities with date opedend, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features making comparisons where relevant.
#data #railway #systems #six #cities #date #opedend #kilometres #route #passenger #numbers #year #millions #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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the table gives us information about underground railway systems in London,Paris,
Tokyo
Use synonyms
,Washinton,
Kyoto
Use synonyms
 and
Los
Use synonyms
 Angeles . with
date
Add an article
the date
a date
show examples
 of opening ,
Add an article
a kilometer
show examples
kilometer
Change the spelling
kilometre
show examples
 of
route
Add an article
the route
show examples
also
Linking Words
Add an article
a
the
show examples
number of visitors
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
per year.
overall
Linking Words
 it can be seen that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most passengers have visited
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 underground
also
Linking Words
 the second one was
paris
Change the capitalization
Paris
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
Add the comma(s)
,
show examples
the level of consumers of underground railway
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 at the lowest point in
Kyoto
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
Los
Use synonyms
 Angeles . regards to two most crowded underground railways
such
Linking Words
 as ,
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 which was
open
Wrong verb form
opened
show examples
 in 1863
an
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 the
lengeth
Correct your spelling
length
 was 394 kilometers the number of passengers
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
1928 millions ,
additionally
Linking Words
 paris railway
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
opened in 1900 but the number of users
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
1191
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 less than
Correct article usage
the useres
show examples
useres
Correct your spelling
users
 of
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 underground . refers to the
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
counries
Correct your spelling
countries
, namely,
england
Change the capitalization
England
show examples
and
washinton
Correct your spelling
Washington
 Dc people in there were
useing
Correct your spelling
using
underground
raiway
Correct your spelling
railway
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the Middle of
Correct article usage
the
show examples
percentage ,(
london
Change the capitalization
London
show examples
 775 ,dc 114 ) , even though ,
Use synonyms
kyoto
Change the capitalization
Kyoto
show examples
 and
los
Use synonyms
 angeles have used the
undeground
Correct your spelling
underground
raily
Correct your spelling
daily
 way at the
bottome
Correct your spelling
bottom
 of the list and at the
lowes
Correct your spelling
lowest
show examples
 level which was 45 for
Use synonyms
kyoto
Change the capitalization
Kyoto
show examples
50 for
Use synonyms
los
Correct your spelling
loss
.
Submitted by dler_shakar on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tokyo, kyoto, los with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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