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Writing Samples
Band 3

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five autralia cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five autralia cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#results #survey #people #coffee #tea #habits #five #autralia #cities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given data shows
of
Correct article usage
a of
show examples
 comparison the
habit
Fix the agreement mistake
habits
show examples
 of people drinking fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
,
instant
Correct word choice
and instant
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
went
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to
Use synonyms
cafe
Add an article
a cafe
the cafe
show examples
 for drinking
coffee
Use synonyms
 or tea in the
last
Linking Words
 month in five
cities
Use synonyms
 in Australia which are Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane,
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 and Hobart. In general, going to the
cafe
Use synonyms
 was the
most
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
favourite in
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
cities
Use synonyms
 and
consume
Wrong verb form
consuming
show examples
 fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
being
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
 choice in all areas.  Melbourne and Hobart became the
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the highest population went to the
cafe
Use synonyms
 and
then
Linking Words
 followed by Sidney. These three
cities
Use synonyms
 have figures
more
Change preposition
of more
show examples
 than sixty per cent.
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 was the city with
lowest
Change the article
the lowest
show examples
 percentage of
cafe
Use synonyms
 lovers. Bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 was the middle of
consument
Correct your spelling
consumption
 in all
cities
Use synonyms
unless
Change preposition
except
show examples
Adelaide
Use synonyms
,
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 was
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the first priority. Drinking fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 in Brisbane and
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 were the lowest participants less than
thirty five
Add a hyphen
thirty-five
show examples
 per cent.
Submitted by aninratnasari on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, cafe, cities, adelaide with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • consumption
  • beverage
  • preference
  • compare
  • quantities
  • supermarkets
  • cafes
  • consume
  • patterns
  • notable
  • significant
  • trends
  • demographic
  • gender
  • habit
  • occasionally
  • frequently
  • cultural influence
  • workdays
  • weekends
  • paraphrase
  • analyze
  • summarize
  • draw conclusions
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