You are a student at a language school in New Zealand studying Business English. Part of the course is a summer work placement programme. Unfortunately, you have just learned from the school that this programme has now been cancelled. Write a letter to the School Principal. In your letter: - State your reason for writing - describe the problem and your concerns - explain what you would like the Principal to do

#student #language #school #zealand #business #english #part #course #summer #work #placement #programme #reason #concerns

Dear Sir, I am writing

this

to express my

dissapointment

Correct your spelling

disappointment

about the cancellation of

summer

Add an article

the summer

a summer

show examples

work

programme

. I came to New Zealand

for studying

Change preposition

to study

show examples

Business English and now that I know that the

programme

has been cancelled, makes me feel extremely terrible. I always wanted to learn about business

english

Change the capitalization

English

show examples

for my professional growth. When I got to know that

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

summer, we

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

be learning professional

english

Change the capitalization

English

show examples

, I was very excited and I cancelled my trip to Australia with my family. I am worried that the cancellation of

this

subject would impact our development and we will

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

refrain from gaining practical experiences. I understand that you have your reasons

to cancel

Change preposition

for canceling

show examples

this

programme

However

, if you can provide any alternative arrangements

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I would

also

like to know the reason for

Correct article usage

the cancellation

show examples

cancellation

Correct article usage

the cancellation

show examples

this

programme

. Please consider the chances of reinstating the

programme

. Sincerely, Navneet

Submitted by nitusidhu650 on Tue Jan 09 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure clear paragraphing with each paragraph focused on a single idea. Paragraphs seemed to contain multiple ideas which impacted the logical flow.

coherence cohesion

Use varied and appropriate cohesive devices to improve the flow and clarity of the letter.

task achievement

Address all parts of the task with sufficient detail. Certain areas could have been elaborated, particularly potential solutions or alternatives you would like to see implemented.

task achievement

Consider using a more formal tone consistently throughout the letter, suitable for the intended recipient, the School Principal.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 150 words in writing task 1. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long letter will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 160 to 190 words in writing task 1. This will ensure a concise letter and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 20 minutes to write the letter and you need around 5 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long letter in 15 minutes.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

148 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

work placement programme
language development
professional growth
alternative arrangements
practical experience
disappointment
concerns
reinstating
feasibility
constructive solution
immediate attention
proactive measures
compensation
repercussions
correspondence
clarification

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Word Count

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Some schools have restricted the use of mobile phones. Is this a positive development or a negative one?

The number of people who are overweight or obese is far higher than in previous generations. What are the reasons for this, and how can the problem be tackled?

Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues, while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Is it a good thing to spend leisure time with a colleague?