Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #years #time #people’s #lives #adult #life #happiness #spite #responsibility

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It is argued that adolescence years are the happiest years in one’s

life

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while

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others believe that

adulthood

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is the most joyful phase to live despite having bigger

responsibilities

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This

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essay believes that,

although

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adolescents

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are free of

responsibilities

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adults

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enjoy their

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life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

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more because they are free to make their own choices. On the one hand,

adolescents

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are thought to live the happiest moments of their

Use synonyms

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

because they are not asked to be responsible. Basically, a teenager lives with his parents, who not only provide him

shelter

Change preposition

with shelter

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, food, and education

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

Linking Words

, in some cases, would try to meet his fantasies.

For instance

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, in my country, teenagers

make

Verb problem

are

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a great example of spoiled people who spend their money carelessly and always ask for more, though they do not seem to be happy.

However

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, I believe that not being obliged to worry about any responsibility is not what happiness is all about, and

Linking Words

consequently

Add a comma

consequently,

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adolescents

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do not live their happiest days.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, others see that

adulthood

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is a happier phase because

adults

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are free to make the choices that fit their aspirations. Having the freedom of choice will eventually be followed by achievements and a sense of self-accomplishment, which is a primary source of joy.

For example

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, many

adults

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in my country are happy because of the choice of career or commitment they took on their own, and they see themselves

happier

Change preposition

as happier

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than when they were teenagers.

Therefore

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, I believe

adulthood

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is the most enjoyable time because one can not be happy if they have to follow others’ plans even

Correct word choice

if it

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comes with no

responsibilities

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. In conclusion, despite having no

responsibilities

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on their shoulders,

adolescents

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do not live the happiest moments of their

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life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

This

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essay believes that it is

adulthood

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which is the most enjoyable in light of the fact that

adults

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are free to make their own choices.

Submitted by ss6802125 on Tue Jan 09 2024

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task response

Your essay presents a clear position throughout the response, and both views are discussed. However, specificity in examples is somewhat lacking. Provide more detailed, real-world instances or statistics to enhance your argument and better illustrate your points.

coherence cohesion

The essay generally organizes information and ideas coherently. Paragraphing is used effectively, but linking words or phrases can be used more skillfully to better highlight the relationships between ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

There is a big number of people who wish to live in big cities. Write an essay to an educated reader to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in big cities. Include reasons and any relevant examples to support your answer.

Some people think that teenage years are the happiest times of most peoples lives.others think that adult life brings more happiness in spite of greater responsibilites . Discuss both veiws and give your opinion.