We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to realize so much on computers? Right at least 250 words.

#technology #change #future #computers #right

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The

technology

has advanced so much since the past. A computer which used to be as large as a car, can be held with one hand nowadays. There comes AI or artificial intelligence

technology

. It is

program

Add an article

a program

show examples

that can learn, think and act like

human

Add an article

a human

show examples

. In

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will estimate what will happen in the future and whether it is good to rely on

Add an article

the computer

a computer

show examples

computer

Fix the agreement mistake

computers

show examples

so much. AI has been

prevalence

Replace the word

prevalent

show examples

for many years.

For example

, when we take

picture

Change the form of the verb

pictures

show examples

of people, the AI in

camera

Add an article

the camera

a camera

show examples

can analyze where a face is and focus on it. But nowadays, it has gone even

further

. Self-driving

car

Fix the agreement mistake

cars

show examples

now

becomes

Wrong verb form

become

show examples

real. By using

camera

Add an article

the camera

a camera

show examples

to detect the other cars and lanes, it can drive on its own without any problem. Maybe in the future, we could have

robot

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robots

show examples

work

for

ourself

Correct pronoun usage

ourselves

show examples

and we can sit around all

days

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day

show examples

doing nothing.

On the contrary

, having

computer

Add an article

the computer

a computer

show examples

do all the

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

for you might not be a good idea. If you rely on something too much, you may become too dependent and can do nothing

with out

Correct your spelling

without

show examples

it.

Furthermore

, having robots

work

in our stead means there is less

work

for us. The number of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unemployed could increase and the job might be harder to find. In conclusion, the

advancing

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advancement

show examples

of computer-based

technology

is making our life better and more convenient. But it comes with risks. Dependence on

technology

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

less effective and when

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

it malfunctions, maybe we won't be able to do anything.

Moreover

, if the robot can

work

in stead

Correct your spelling

instead

show examples

of us, maybe we aren't needed for the job anymore.

Submitted by Ze.Nin3.R0 on Wed Jan 10 2024

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coherence cohesion

While the essay shows a basic structure with an introduction and conclusion, it lacks clear paragraphing and the ideas are not well-developed, which affects the logical flow. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is supported by specific examples or explanations.

task achievement

The response addresses the topic, but does so superficially. Develop your ideas more comprehensively by explaining how technology may change in the future. Include more specific examples and consider the implications of these changes.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Computer-based technology
Reliance/dependency
Artificial intelligence (AI)
Automation
Virtual reality (VR)
Augmented reality (AR)
Internet of Things (IoT)
Smart devices
Privacy concerns
Digital divide
Sedentary lifestyle
Cybersecurity
Online learning platforms
Job displacement
Ethical considerations
Human-computer interaction
Digitalization
Remote work
Fintech
Conventional dynamics

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We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to realize so much on computers? Right at least 250 words.

Fully explain your ideas

You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part time job while you are studying. So you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter give details of your study plans Explain why you want to get a part time job

Governments in many countries are urgently seeking ways to reduce unemployment in rural areas. What are the most effective ways to do this? Which measure do you think would be the single most effective step that governments could take?

Some people say that individuals who make a lot of money are the most successful. Others think that those who contribute to society like scientists and teachers are more successful. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Many people like to go on holiday abroad, while other believes it is better to visit places within their own country. Discuss both of view and give your opinion.

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?