Some people believe that touristsdo not learn anything during their holidays, while others believe that they learn a lot. Discuss both sides .
Nowadays, it is
lot
easier to travel. Correct article usage
a lot
Due to
the development of technology and infrastructure, the number of visitors
are
increasing rapidly in every Change the verb form
is
spots
. It is argued thatChange to a singular noun
spot
,
Remove the comma
apply
tourist
learn nothing Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
while
they are on vacation, while
others think that gain a lot. This
essay agrees that, in terms of learning perspective, individuals aquire
a lot from their vacation.
Correct your spelling
acquire
Holidays
offer wide
range of knowledge towards Add an article
a wide
visitors
, which consider
more worthy than reading a book in Wrong verb form
is considered
a
school. Since every Correct article usage
apply
spots
Change to a singular noun
spot
have
something new to provide. Correct subject-verb agreement
has
Therefore
people are able to learn while
they spend time in their places of interest. It is therefore
agreed that travelling is beneficial. For example
, on my last
vacation
I Add a comma
vacation,
was
to India and Verb problem
went
I
visited 10 museums. Correct pronoun usage
apply
This
help
me to learn more clearly about ancient cultures than Change the verb form
helps
to
my school books.
Change preposition
in
However
, many disagree that holidays
do not put any value in
their learning process. It Change preposition
on
just
a waste of time and money. Despite Add a missing verb
is just
this
, travelling gives visitors
a fresh start as well as
new opportunities to learn about new things, which is never before possible, and this
essay disagree
that Change the verb form
disagrees
tourist
learn nothing during their Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
holidays
. For instances
, when someone Fix the agreement mistake
instance
travelling
to Replace the word
travels
new
destination, they get to learn something which is not possible from any paid courses.
In conclusion, Add an article
a new
the new
while
the benefits of holidays
, particularly travelling, allow visitors
to tap into limitless sources of information, some still think that, it has no value. However
, holidays
are beneficial for learning progress.Submitted by sahareatushar124 on
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Task Achievement
In terms of task achievement, the response addresses the prompt but does so unevenly. Ideas are presented, yet the argument is not fully balanced, with one viewpoint discussed in more detail than the other. To improve, ensure that both sides of the argument are explored equally and that the conclusion effectively summarizes this balance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Concerning coherence and cohesion, the essay has a discernible structure with an introduction and conclusion. However, there is repetition and lack of varied linking words, which affects the logical flow of ideas. Work on organizing points more clearly and use a wider range of cohesive devices. Avoid unnecessary repetitions and strive for concise and clear sentence structures.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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