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Writing Samples
Band 6

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#land #three #regions #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The pie graph depicts four factors
Correct pronoun usage
that contributed
show examples
contributed
Wrong verb form
contribute
show examples
 to global
soil
Use synonyms
 erosion.The table represents the impact of those four factors on three areas namely North America,
Europe
Use synonyms
 and Oceania.
Overall
Linking Words
,four main contributors are logging the trees, over-grazing, overplanting crops and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
. One more
Europe
Use synonyms
's fields were
partucularly
Correct your spelling
particularly
 affected as a
results
Correct the article-noun agreement
result
show examples
 of those treatments. Over one-third of all causes
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 feeding farm animals
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
30%
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
brought up
Verb problem
caused
show examples
 by cutting down
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
trees and almost the same proportion was because of intensive cultivation of crops and other causes composed 7%. Only 5% of total
soil
Use synonyms
 in North America was
erosed
Correct your spelling
erased
eroded
 by deforestation,
over grasing
Correct your spelling
over-grazing
 and
overcultivation
Correct your spelling
over-cultivation
over cultivation
 with the figures 0.2%,1.5% and 3.3%
Linking Words
accordingly
Rephrase
respectively
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
 in islands of
Pacific
Correct article usage
the Pacific
show examples
ocean
Capitalize word
Ocean
show examples
,Australia and New
Zeland
Correct your spelling
Zealand
show examples
 cutting down the forests and farm animals contributed
1.7
Change preposition
to 1.7
show examples
% and 11.3% respectively
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
degradation.Interestingly overcropping had no effect on
soil
Use synonyms
 erosion.In
Europe
Use synonyms
 where land was especially affected deforestation turned most of the land unproductive with
percentage
Add an article
the percentage
a percentage
show examples
 of 9.8% and almost
Correct article usage
a quater
show examples
quater
Correct your spelling
quarter
 of
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
soil
Use synonyms
 in
Europe
Use synonyms
 was affected by these factors where
overgazing
Correct your spelling
overgrazing
show examples
 contributed to 5.5% and overfarming to 7.7%.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words soil, europe with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pie chart
  • Table
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Decreasing productivity
  • Reasons
  • Regional variations
  • Data
  • Summarize
What to do next:
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