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Band 4

some people say that economic growth is the only way to end world poverty and hunger. Others say that economic growth is damaging the environment and should stop. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #growth #world #poverty #hunger #environment
In contemporary society,
XXXX
 has been a topic of interest among the masses.
While
 some are firmly convinced that
XXXX
, a considerable amount of others posit
XXXX
.
Although
 both sides have their merits, I lean more towards the former/latter viewpoint.
While
 some individuals champion the notion that
XXXX
, a significant number of others posit that
XXXX
.
To begin
 with, some individuals champion that
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,
while
 a In a nutshell, I remain unwavering in my conviction that
XXXX
. Admittedly, potential pitfalls in the backdrop.
However
, I contend that the arguments I have elucidated above robustly vindicate my stance.
Submitted by xianghuikong2023 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay fails to adhere to the logical structure expected in this form of task. It is crucial to develop coherent paragraphs that substantiate each viewpoint with appropriate examples and explanations.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are inadequate, consisting of placeholder text (XXXX) rather than actual content. Both the introduction and conclusion should clearly present the topics and the writer's opinion in a structured and complete manner.
task achievement
The essay lacks clear and comprehensive development of ideas. Instead of using placeholder text (XXXX), you should fully elaborate on your points with distinct, well-explained arguments.
supported main points
The main points in your essay are not supported with relevant examples and explanations. Specific details are essential to strengthen your argument and effectively address the prompt.
complete response
To improve your task achievement score, ensure that you fully respond to the prompt, including a discussion of both views and providing your own opinion with a clear, substantiated rationale.
relevant specific examples
For a more effective essay, you need to use precise information, examples, and persuasive arguments that are directly related to the topic at hand. This enriches the essay's clarity and depth.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic growth
  • Gross Domestic Product (GDP)
  • Infrastructural development
  • Social services
  • Quality of life
  • Trickle-down effect
  • Poverty alleviation
  • Industrialization
  • Deforestation
  • Climate change
  • Biodiversity
  • Resource depletion
  • Sustainable growth
  • Renewable energy
  • Wellbeing indices
  • Environmental protection
  • Technological advancements
  • Global responsibility
  • Consumer behavior
  • Green technology
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