The most important thing of science is to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.
Science
,
and many things that led to more important inventions have already helped Remove the comma
apply
our
mankind in countless ways. Correct pronoun usage
apply
While
many people believe that the most crucial purpose of it is to improve our lives, there are some who agree that those statements are not the main point of science
itself. In my opinion, I stand with the latter part, as I genuinely think that it is not the most important thing of
the issue.
First and foremost, the usage of Change preposition
about
science
does not have to show immediate results of
improving Change preposition
in
human’s
lives directly. Change noun form
human
For instance
, university students all around Indonesia have shown numerous grand inventions while
using science
as the pillar of their knowledge (e.g
Correct your spelling
e.g.
to make
electric cars). Change the verb form
making
Although
the project might be successful, a number of communities are still considering whether or not the product can be used in real life. In this
situation, even if they have to deal with disappointment, science
can be preserved in their way of great thinking.
Secondly
, the existence of science
itself is already a
living proof that humans are indeed evolving. Looking back to many decades before Correct article usage
apply
this
, we probably could hardly imagine that someday, a way to communicate with someone can be only one click of a button away. Thus
, it is significant to not let improvements be made by science
, to define our status of lives.
In conclusion, though an example of what we can get from scientific research is highly appreciated, it is much more crucial to hold the principle close and pass it down to our
future generations. A great invention is just some bonus we could get along the way.Correct pronoun usage
apply
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task achievement
Ensure to restate the question and clearly outline your stance on the topic in the introduction. Additionally, strengthen the conclusion by summarizing your argument and emphasizing your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Strive for a clearer progression of ideas and arguments throughout the essay. Use a broader range of cohesive devices to guide the reader and establish a stronger connection between main points.
task achievement
Avoid using vague expressions such as 'many people' or 'some who agree' without specifying who these groups are. Use concrete examples or cite specific studies to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying sentence structures for greater clarity and impact. Complex and compound sentences can demonstrate language proficiency.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite