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Band 4.5

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992.

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992.
#two #show #employment #patterns #britain
The two
pie
 charts illustrate some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992. It is obvious that women prefer
jobs
 that do not involve physical
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
 men’s
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
, but that’s not always the case. The figures
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
pie
 charts are similar to each other.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 the vast majority of those parties prefer
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
manual
jobs
.
Furthermore
, only six
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 in the
pie
 chart prefer clerical or related work,
whereas
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
31
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of female employees prefer these
jobs
. Men are
good
Correct word choice
better
show examples
 at crafts or similar
jobs
 than women.
Also
, 36% of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
twenty nine
Add a hyphen
twenty-nine
show examples
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 in
pie
Correct article usage
the pie
show examples
 charts prefer managerial and professional
jobs
. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conclusion, the two
pie
chats
Correct your spelling
charts
show examples
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 that female and male employees have the same percentage of manual and non-manual
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words pie, jobs with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.
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