A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that the benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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There are many countries across the world in which
tourism
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represents the main economic income.
As a
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A
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possible explanation
to
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for
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this
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, could be the fact that these places have a huge source of natural beauty wealth, despite other low development in other areas
such
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as
,
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apply
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internacional
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international
trade, service sector, export and others.
Nonetheless
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,
rely
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relying
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on
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tourism
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the tourism
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market to support the economic panorama of a
place
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, can make it tackle some problems. Many advantages can be listed by fostering
people
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to
visite
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visit
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a
touristic
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tourist
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place
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. Through
this
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, it is possible
disseminate
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to disseminate
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information about the local culture, foment the market and create job opportunities.
Thus
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, the activity can amplify
social
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the social
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and
economically
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economic
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the
place
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's perspective. In my region,
for instance
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, there are restaurants on the riverside which are known for having visitors from diverse parts of the globe.
However
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, there are many drawbacks related to the
activety
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activity
as well. Seasonality,
for instance
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, is an important aspect to be considered. A
place
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that cannot count on other incomes from another sector will struggle
in managing
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to manage
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the
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its
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finances.
Besides
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that, adversities are able to occur and cause interference
on
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in
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the
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apply
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tourism
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exploitation.
For example
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, in 2020 the world dealt with the Covid-19 pandemic, which made
people
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locked down for many months.
As a result
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, a bunch of
entrepeneurs
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entrepreneurs
who had their business related to
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people
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people's
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visitation had to close.
To conclude
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, in my point of view,
tourism
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is a perfect way to explore
natural
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the natural
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beaty
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beauty
of a
place
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, the hospitality of
people
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and foster the economic and social aspects. But,
besides
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that
Add a comma
that,
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it is important to manage other income sources to avoid economic dependence
from
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on
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just one activity.
Submitted by carinabmurakami on

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coherence cohesion
Establish a clearer and more cohesive structure that logically connects your ideas. The essay currently seems to have a loose structure; ensure that each paragraph clearly presents one main idea with appropriate supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion were present, however, make them more impactful by providing a clearer thesis statement in the introduction and a more direct summary of the main points in the conclusion. This would strengthen your essay structure.
coherence cohesion
Provide more developed examples to support your main points. The use of personal examples was good, but they need to be more detailed and explicitly connected to your argument to be effective.
task achievement
Ensure a complete response by fully addressing all parts of the prompt; in this case, you need to provide a more extensive analysis of the advantages and disadvantages of tourism. Make this evident throughout the essay rather than just stating them briefly.
task achievement
Develop your ideas more comprehensively. While you touched on relevant points, expanding on these would illustrate a deeper understanding of the topic. Explain the impact and implications of each advantage or disadvantage to enhance clarity and depth of your analysis.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your claims about tourism. Include statistics, case studies, or historical comparisons when possible to demonstrate a wider knowledge of the subject.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainable tourism
  • ecotourism
  • heritage sites
  • hospitality industry
  • tourist influx
  • cultural commodification
  • ecological footprint
  • economic diversification
  • carrying capacity
  • cultural sensitivity
  • destination marketing
  • travel advisories
  • visitor management
  • impact assessment
  • tourism revenues
  • authentic experience
  • visitor satisfaction
  • conservation efforts
  • seasonal fluctuation
  • social sustainability
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