Some people move to other countries when they retire. Others think that it is better to retire in their home country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.
The issue of whether individuals should migrate to other
countries
for retirement or retire in their home country
has sparked a lot of controversy. One side
believes people
should move to other countries
for retirement because they say changing an environment can have a positively
impact on the mind and they say foreign Change the adverb
positive
countries
have better standards of living. However
, the other side
thinks that it is better to retire in their countries
because they articulate that staying in a foreign country
is very costly and there are usually social problems. I personally side
with those that
are against the idea of retiring in a foreign nation.
Those Correct pronoun usage
who
that
argue that moving to other Correct pronoun usage
who
countries
when retiring is the best point out that it can help relax and refresh the mind. They say that it is obvious that when an individual changes an environment , it can help stimulate positive thinking and help individuals to
learn many new things Verb problem
apply
for
and relax Change preposition
apply
for example
learning a new culture and the way people
do their daily activities can help change the way you think. Moreover
, they also
articulate that foreign countries
usually have better standards of living and better business opportunities. Individuals often move to richer countries
that have low inflation rates, high business opportunities and quality health care. For
instance
some Add a comma
instance,
people
are attracted by low inflation rates and stable exchange rates in richer countries
so as a result
they can have higher profit returns by investing in these countries
even though this
is not always the case.
On the other
hand
those that contest that it's better for Add a comma
hand,
people
to retire in their home countries
argue that moving to a foreign country
is very costly. They believe that retirement income cannot cover all the financial needs in a foreign country
which include housing costs and healthcare although
this
depends with
the wealth of an individual. Change preposition
on
In addition
, they articulate that moving to a foreign country
has many social problems for illustration there will be a language barrier so it's very hard to make friends and communicate with citizens of that country
often leading to depression and isolation. Also
it's difficult to adjust to a new culture as Add a comma
Also,
this
can take many years.
I personally side
with those that say moving to a foreign country
has many challengies
especially if you Correct your spelling
challenges
dont
have other family members staying in that Correct your spelling
don't
country
in particular
. Although
you can have access to high quality
medical care , staying abroad can affect you mentally as you normally have difficulties making new friends and communicating with Add a hyphen
high-quality
evryone
.
In Correct your spelling
everyone
conlusion
, Correct your spelling
conclusion
this
issue will remain a heated one, as both side
have different reasons.Change to a plural noun
sides
Submitted by karigaruvimbo on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis statement clearly. Each paragraph in the body should contain a main idea, supporting details, and a concluding sentence. The essay should end with a conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing logical transitions between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words effectively to guide the reader through your arguments. This will enhance the coherence of your essay.
task achievement
Expand your main points with relevant examples and details. Each argument should be well supported by specific evidence or examples. This will increase the persuasiveness of your essay.
task achievement
Strive for completeness in responding to the task. Make sure to discuss both views thoroughly and provide a clear opinion. Each viewpoint should be explored in equal depth to demonstrate a balanced and objective analysis before presenting your own standpoint.
task achievement
Refine the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and is fully developed. This will help the reader understand and follow your arguments more easily.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.