IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You have been invited to attend an interview for a place studying a course in a college. Unfortunately, because of a previous appointment, you cannot come at the time they wish. Write a letter to the admissions tutor: explain your position apologise and offer to come on another day or later the same day. ask how long the interview will be and whether there will be any tests during it.

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Dear Sir, I am grateful to you for inviting me on the discussion which is going to be held on 1st March at your college. Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend
this
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 meeting as I will have to go to the hospital with my mother because of her surgery on the same date and doctor strictly said that operation should be done as soon as possible. I extremely apologize for leaving
this
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 iteration and I request you to manage the next day or some other alternative plan for meeting so that I can participate with fresh mind and fully prepared. One more thing I would like to ask you that I came to know through your mail that there will be the assessment test before interview and tell me about the meeting duration that how long it will be the
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. Thank you for your consideration and I am looking forward your response regarding schedule. Yours faithfully, Muhammad Musab

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coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, it would be beneficial to arrange your ideas more logically and use paragraphing effectively. Aim to have a clear introductory paragraph, a coherent body with each paragraph focusing on a single idea, and a closing paragraph that wraps up your letter. Use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly,' 'Moreover,' and 'Finally' to connect your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The letter should be formatted with appropriate greeting and closing. Ensure you open with 'Dear [Title] [Surname],' and end with 'Yours sincerely' if you know the name of the person, or 'Yours faithfully' if you do not. As you do know the title (Admissions Tutor), it would be more appropriate to use 'Yours sincerely'.
task achievement
You have covered all the key points required by the task but the tone used throughout the letter is slightly informal and abrupt at places. To improve task achievement, consider using polite and formal language, and elaborate on your points to fully explain your situation and request. Phrases like 'I would be highly appreciative if' and 'I would like to inquire about' can help soften your language and present a more formal tone.
task achievement
In your letter, address each of the bullet points with sufficient detail while maintaining a formal tone throughout. For the apologies and alternative arrangements, elaborate on your willingness to cooperate and clearly propose a suitable alternative while asking the admissions tutor for their preferences.
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