IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#line #show #information #crime #uk #year #summarise #features #comparisons
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The line graph depicts information about the correlation between age and
crime
Use synonyms
 in the UK
last
Linking Words
 year,
while
Linking Words
 the pie chart illustrates the percentage of four different crimes in the same country and year.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is noticeable that young people, 12 to 28
years
Use synonyms
 old, have the highest
rate
Use synonyms
 of
crime
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 children who are between 0 to 8
years
Use synonyms
 old have the lowest
rate
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
 interesting to note that the highest proportion of
crime
Use synonyms
 that has been done is violence. In terms of
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
, youth who were about 21
years
Use synonyms
 old achieved a peak at 800000 activities as opposed to the babies and pupils under 9
years
Use synonyms
 old which contributed nothing. For elderly people, the
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 remained low approximately 100000 on average. With regards to the type of
crime
Use synonyms
, violence has almost a half proportion at 46% compared to property
crime
Use synonyms
 which has nearly a quarter. In comparison with goods property, medicine
crime
Use synonyms
 has a slight discrepancy at 22%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, public order
crime
Use synonyms
 was nearly one-fifth at just 9%.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words crime, years, rate with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • The line graph depicts
  • The pie chart illustrates
  • reveals
  • displays
  • depicts
  • the trend of
  • the overall crime rate
  • steadily decreased
  • the distribution of
  • different types of crime
  • prevalent
  • accounts for
  • the most common crime
  • followed by
  • make up
  • a smaller proportion of
  • the total crimes
  • a smaller percentage
  • approximately
  • the remaining percentage
  • It is important to note that
  • reflects
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