IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The diagram shows a possible future means of home energy production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram shows a possible future means of home energy production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#future #home #energy #production #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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This
Linking Words
 infographic shows
an information
Remove the article
information
a piece of information
show examples
 about how to make electricity in the future. From the general overview, it can be seen that it has six steps until it
finally
Linking Words
 can be used for home
energy
Use synonyms
. First and foremost, the compost of ferments methane
gas
Use synonyms
consist
Wrong verb form
consisting
show examples
 of leaves, food, scraps, etc will be gathered until it
filled
Wrong verb form
fills
show examples
 3/4 of
steel
Correct article usage
the steel
show examples
 tank in order to transform the
gas
Use synonyms
 out into a methane
gas
Use synonyms
 storage by using a pipe.
This
Linking Words
 process will continue to compress all the
gas
Use synonyms
 into the compressor machine until it is suitable enough to get processed by
combustion
Add an article
a combustion
the combustion
show examples
 engine. In fact,
this
Linking Words
 is the
last
Linking Words
 moment the
gas
Use synonyms
 stays
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 its element.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the combustion engine machine will be the first mechanical process where the
gas
Use synonyms
 becomes
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
energy
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 engine leads the
gas
Use synonyms
 out through the mechanical process and
change
Change the verb form
changes
show examples
 it into
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
mechanical
energy
Use synonyms
 before it enters the generator system. After the mechanical
energy
Use synonyms
 has been generated and changed into an electrical
energy
Use synonyms
 in
generator
Correct article usage
the generator
show examples
 system, it will be allocated into a battery where the whole electric
energy
Use synonyms
 will be saved. More than that, the battery will distribute the electricity from the storage for home usage.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • renewable energy
  • sustainability
  • solar panels
  • energy storage
  • wind turbine
  • geothermal
  • energy efficiency
  • carbon footprint
  • grid
  • biomass
  • photovoltaic
  • smart meter
  • energy consumption
  • insulation
  • heat pump
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