Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The way to improve public
health
is very difficult to define. Because it means so many different things to different
people
.
While
some
people
link increasing the number of sports facilities and attracting
people
to the gym, Others think it is relative to a balanced diet. Yet others think that a clean environment rather than either regular exercise or healthy food is the only way to improve public
healthy
Replace the word
health
show examples
. Because
people
interpret
helthy
Correct your spelling
healthy
lifestyles in so many different ways
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
themselves it is difficult to give any
deffinition
Correct your spelling
definition
that is
true for everyone.
However
, if there are different ways to maintain public
health
for different individuals
then
the first step in achieving it would be to have a degree of self-knowledge. A person needs to know how their body works before looking for ways to improve their
health
. Of course, factors
such
as good habits,
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
intake
vitamins
Change preposition
of vitamins
show examples
, nutrition and protein or a peaceful environment all contribute to our physical
health
. But
this
does not mean, that
people
without these factors cannot be healthy.
To conclude
, I think
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
ability to use everything so much is a more essential factor in achieving
disease-free
Correct article usage
a disease-free
show examples
life. By that, I mean an ability to have a clear sense of what is important in our lives and what is not.
Submitted by mikma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your essay has a clear thesis statement that responds directly to the essay question. Your introduction should clearly state whether you believe that increasing sports facilities is the best way to improve public health or that other measures are needed.
task response
Develop your main points with specific examples and explanations. Your essay should include specific reasons why increasing sports facilities may or may not improve public health, as well as suggestions for other measures if you believe they are necessary.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your ideas logically and coherently. Each paragraph should contain one main idea and be clearly linked to others using cohesive devices. Avoid presenting multiple ideas within a single paragraph without clear organization.
language
Use an appropriate range of vocabulary and strive for accuracy in grammar and sentence construction. Avoid overly broad or vague statements and focus on concrete ideas to support your position.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
What to do next:
Look at other essays: