SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT WOMEN SHOULD PLAY AN EQUAL ROLE AS MEN IN A COUNTRY’S POLICE FORCE OR MILITARY FORCE, SUCH AS THE ARMY, WHILE OTHERS THINK WOMEN ARE NOT SUITABLE FOR THESE KIND OF JOBS. DISCUSS BOTH THE VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.
Nowadays, people have different views about whether
women
should participate in police
force or Add an article
the police
army
. I will explain both sides and give my own opinion.
On the one hand, Correct article usage
the army
women
can bring different perspectives and strengths to these roles. Women
are overall
more sensititive
and have Correct your spelling
sensitive
a
better observation than men which allows them to provide effective communication and emotional intelligence in some situations. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, during rescues, if there were female officers providing calm and clear instructios
, the process would become smoother and Correct your spelling
instructions
instruction
will
Correct your spelling
well
monitored
.
Add a missing verb
be monitored
On the other hand
, some may believe that physical difference
between men and Fix the agreement mistake
differences
women
could affect performance in malitary
and police tasks. Difference Correct your spelling
military
such
as weight and height between male
and Fix the agreement mistake
males
female
brings unreachable strength Fix the agreement mistake
females
difference
between the two genders. In some Fix the agreement mistake
differences
situation
where both power and speed are required like in Fix the agreement mistake
situations
battle
Correct your spelling
the
field
, female soldiers may struggle to perform as powerful as male soldiers.
In my opinion, making occupations more open for both genders has distinct advantages. Correct your spelling
battlefield
While
providing different aspects into these roles, women
have be
proven to be as Change the form of the verb
been
compititive
as men. A good illustration is that recently, more and more female athletes Correct your spelling
competitive
are
reported by Wrong verb form
have been
news
. I believe Add an article
the news
women
should have the right to choose their career paths, including in military and police services.Submitted by yuyi981121 on
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Introduction
Make sure you have a clear introduction that states the topic of the essay as well as your opinion. This will help orient the reader to what will follow.
Logical Structure & Cohesion
Develop a more structured approach by creating clear paragraphs that each focus on a single main idea. Use cohesive devices to link your ideas within and across paragraphs.
Supported Points & Examples
Expand your main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples to fully develop your argument. Include a wider variety of examples to strengthen your case.
Conclusion
Sum up your discussion effectively by reiterating your opinion and the most compelling points you've made in the conclusion.
Task Response
Ensure that the response directly answers all parts of the task, and expands on these points to demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
Coherence
To improve your coherence, clarity can be enhanced by using a range of linking words and synonyms to ensure fluidity and avoid repetition.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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