IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentages #meals #three #nutrients #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given pie charts
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
 the proportion of
of
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
the average meals in three different types of
nutriets
Correct your spelling
nutrients
, which potentially have adverse on human well-being if consumed too much.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the largest percentage was in
dinner
Use synonyms
 consumption among the other meals.
In contrast
Linking Words
 to that,
breakfast
Use synonyms
 was the lowest one, with the exception of sodium
nutriets
Correct your spelling
nutrients
.
I
Correct your spelling
In
show examples
 term of sodium,
dinner
Use synonyms
 was the
dominated
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
 meal with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 percentage of 42%
while
Linking Words
 snacks and
breakfast
Use synonyms
 were unpopular sustenance with the same rate at 14%. Compared with saturated fat,
dinner
Use synonyms
 and lunch did not
expirienced
Correct your spelling
experienced
experience
 a significant difference,
constituted
Wrong verb form
constituting
show examples
 37% and 26%, respectively.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
breakfast
Use synonyms
 makes up
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
16%,
while
Linking Words
 the proportion
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 snacks accounted for nearly one-fifth of the meals. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sugar, the ratio was
little
Correct article usage
a little
show examples
diverse
Correct word choice
different
show examples
 from other edibles. The highest meal
containng
Correct your spelling
containing
 added sugar is snacks, which
conprise
Correct your spelling
comprise
comprises
 one-fifth of the chart. The lowest one is
breakfast
Use synonyms
, which was 16%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the percentage of
dinner
Use synonyms
 and lunch only constituted
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
23% and 19%, respectively.
Submitted by dilnurakari06 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words dinner, breakfast with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • unhealthy
  • typical meals
  • percentages
  • saturated fats
  • fibers
  • sugars
  • impact
  • average
  • consumption
  • trends
  • breakfast
  • lunch
  • dinner
  • highest
  • lowest
  • variation
  • implications
  • balanced diet
  • recommendations
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